CAT NEWS! da da da la la la
by EvilKillerPrincess
Summary: IM BACK AGAIN! 4 real cats and i'm still here and planning on staying. Come see tigerstar turning from thong to evil? Firestar and sandstorm? what happened? OMG! shocking twist! somehting weird has happened on cat news! read to find out! R
1. welcome to cat news!

Disclaimer: i own nothing, got that?

* * *

I now announce the new……(trumpets)

Cat news!

Da da da la la la (weird news beginning song.)

"Hello and welcome to warriors news! Today iwould like to announce, Firestar just made out with sandstorm!" Cloudtail meowed

"False information!" firestar meowed fixing his tie.

"Now for the weather!" sandstorm meowed

"Its raining out today! Simple as that!" silverstream purred.

"Back to you firestar!"

"Thanks silverstream very detailed. Last night at 9:00 riverclan fired a missile at windclan. We're here live with tallstar."

"Tallstar, how do you feel?"

"Crappy firestar! Half our clan is ill from the radiation!" Tallstar hissed

"Well don't just stand there! Shot em! Pew pew pew! Boom! Pow pow! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeew!" sandstorm meowed playing with her toy aircraft.

"Back to you Cloudtail!"

"Thanks firestar recently, well 5 minutes ago graystripe kissed silverstream! Oooooo!" Cloudtail meowed

"False information!" Graystripe mowed wiping the bright red lip-gloss of his fur.

"Yesterday, could shadowclan b stealing Thunderclan fresh-kill pile?" Cloudtail meowed

"What do you have to say about this tigerstar?" Cloudtail meowed

"Well…shh bluestar… we haven't been stealing... aaa ha ha ha bluestar stop it! Thunderclans fresh-kill. Bluestar stop it!" Tigerstar meowed

"Sandstorm take it!" Cloudtail meowed

"Yesterday leopardstar's jet plane crashed into a tree wounding her clan, but no one died." Sandstorm meowed shoving a cracker in he mouth.

"Well sandstorm that's it for now- we'll be back after these following messages!" Firestar purred.

-Commercials-

da la da lala da la la

"Welcome back! Firestar is going out with spottedleaf!" Cloudtail meowed

"Firestar come to your office!" sandstorm meowed

"I wouldn't-"firestar meowed trying to grab sandstorm.

"Betrayer!" sandstorm hissed looking at spottedleaf grabbing chocolate bars from firestar's desk.

"Oh c'mon I was hungry!" spottedleaf meowed.

"E hem you guy this I live television…" Cloudtail meowed

"In other news, silverstream, weather?"

"Are you guy's retards? I said it was raining! But the rai is slowly dying! Back to you sandstorm."

"I'm hotter than spottedleaf!" sandstorm hissed "oh yeah umm… Cinderpelt saw a vision from starclan! Here live." Sandstorm purred.

-Cinderpelt meditating in her office-

"I see chocolate! And llamas! And cows! AND BUTZEN LAKE!" Cinderpelt screamed terrified.

"That's all folks! Run to your bomb shelters cuz y'all gonna die!" sandstorm screamed.

-Show is all a little grey fuzzy screen-

-End of show music-

* * *

next chapter, is news! cat news! da da da da la la la la la la la. reveiw? 


	2. welcome back!

"welcome back to cat news!" Cloudtail purred

"yeah! Welcome back!" sandstorm meowed buttoning her shirt and sitting down in her seat.

"sandstorm your late!" firestar hissed

"well I'd shut up since you we're dating Spottedleaf!" sandstorm meowed

"you guys top this is news!" Cloudtail meowed "recently graystripe was sleeping at the edge of silverstreams waterbed!"

"Cloudtail you said you'd keep that a secret!" graystripe hissed

"I'm a news reporter what to you expect?" Cloudtail meowed.

"well umm in other news, Tallstar ate a chocolate bar, screamed, and kissed tigerstar?" sandstorm meowed.

"wow didn't see that coming." Firestar meowed.

"silverstream weather?" sandstorm meowed

"yeah sure what ever are you all stupid? The flipping' weather is sunny! Look out side your window, no wait lets make this into small easy steps! Get off your couch…okay now walk to your window… okay open your blinds or curtains or both… now look at the sky… and there! Its sunny! Silverstream meowed.

"wow thank yo silverstream, very helpful! Next tim tell us tomorrows weathr!" firestar meowed

"what? Are you crazy? You're a retard! I can't predict the future! Or can i? muahahahaha! And eve if I could hy would I tell you the weather!" silverstream meowed.

"silverstream you're the weather lady!" firestar hissed

"okay Cloudtail hit it!" sandstorm mowed.

" huh what? Oh yeah… e hem yesterday firestar went to dinner in th newest starclan dinner theater with spottedleaf!"

"okay firestar! My office now!" sandstorm meowed

"yes miss.." firestar gulped

-background noises-

"how dare you firestar!" sandstorm hissed

-slap slap slap-

"oooooooowwww!" firestar hissed walking back to his seat.

"wow lots o betrayal!" Cloudtail purred

"commercials!" firestar meowed

COMMERCIALS:

"is your life full of boredom and gloom? Ten get this pen! This little birdy pen!"

movie commercial la la la

car commercial la la la

oohh cat news!

"welcome back!" sandstorm meowed fixing her hair.

"yes welcome back!" firestar meowed scratching his head.

"a few minutes ago-" Cloudtail go cut off.

"no telling this one!" sandstorm hissed.

"oh yeah? Watch me! SANDTORM IS HAVING KITS!" Cloudtail screamed

"commercials!" sandstorm hissed

drink commercial

restaurant commercial

car commercial

oohh cat news!

"welcome back, unfortunately five minutes ago Cloudtail had to be rushed to the hospital, to replace him, brambleclaw!"

"Thank you sandstorm! Wow never thought I would get this job! I would like to thank my dog, and my bunny, and my parents, and my sweater, and my new pair of jeans!" brambleclaw meowed.

"well brambleclaw welcome!" sandstorm meowed

"oh my god! Sandstorm shot Cloudtail!" brambleclaw screamed.

"false information!" sandstorm hissed wiping the blood off her paws.

"well that conclude this show! See ya next time!"

dad a da la la la da la dadadalaaalaaa

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prabably not as funny as the first one but what ever, want a idea to pt in this show? then jst tell the idea! "yeah! and get ur lazy butt off the chair so i dont have to tell youth fake weather!" silverstream hissed. sorry silverstrea keeps typing stuff on my computer. 


	3. bearbert bear einstein johaneson

"welcome back to cat news!" sandstorm greeted happily

"yo sup g dawg!" firestar purred wearing extremely big chains around his neck.

"hi grandma!" brambleclaw meowed happily.

"oh….k….then….." sandstorm and firestar meowed looking ta brambleclaw, he had such a huge embarrassing smile on his face.

"well silverstream, weather?" firestar meowed

"its raining." Silverstream meowed

"c'mon!"

"fine its sunny! Go outside and go fishing or something!" silverstream hissed throwing her uniform. "I quit!"

(people run outside with fishing gear)

"its raining! Angry people! Angry people!" some random person screamed knocking down the news studio.

"we're here live at the kool-aide murder scene, go for it tigerstar." Sandstorm meowed

(odd voice) "we're hear today while a person just drank the kool-aide guy! Bluestar stop it! Any how we think it was Cloudtail cuz he got a cup in his paws! With a giant straw! For gods sake bluestar stop it! WE'RE HERE WITH INSPECTOR CAT."

"mr. kool-aide dude who killed you?" Inspector cat meowed

"well that's all peeps! Hit it firestar!" tigerstar said thinking the camera was turned off. "bluestar would you stop playing with my tail?" "fine its just that its soooooooooooo fluffy! I wanna cuddle you all night!" bluestar meowed "aww lets go home" tigerstar meowed

"gotcha!" the camera man screamed running away.

"in other news Cloudtail got back from the hostpital, so Cloudtail how are you?" firestar meowed

(Cloudtail all shakey and crazy looking) " you gotta gun! Ahhh! Ahhh! Aahhh!" Cloudtail screamed.

"that's gooooood well time for commercials!" BRAMBLECLAW PURRED

commercials.

More commercials.

Ooo cat news!

"WELCOME BACK! Wait where's sandstorm?" Firestar meowed

"fear me!" squirrelkit screamed crawling on the ceiling with her head twisted all away around.

"I'm gonna get you!" leafkit hissed clawing the freakishly demented Squirrelkit

"it hurts." Sandstorm meowed grabbing a huge bottle of vodka.

"you cant drink!" firestar hissed

"who put you in charge?" sandstorm hissed

"I'm leader? I donno" firestar meowed

(sandstorm drops vodka)

"ahh! My $1 alcohol beverage!"

"well we ran out of time bye people!"

"RAAAA!" BEARBERT, BEAR, EINSTEIN JOHANESON SCREAMED.

"AHHHHHH! BYE AGAIN... AHHHHH!"

* * *

HOW YOU LIKE THIS 1? SQUIRELLKITS A FREAKISHLY DEMENTED KITTY CAT!...BEARBERT? WHAT THE HECK... REVEIW IS YOU WISH, BUT IT WOULD BE NICE BUT WUTEVER! WE'LL BE BACK WITH LONGER(MAYBE) STORIES! AND GIVE US SOME VERY RANDOM ISSUES! 


	4. RANDOM PEOPLE

okay remember this disclaimer for every chapter i write if you can: I OWN NOTHING! except for maybe my name... BUT MOSTLY NOTHING! oh and the cat news idea wasn't really mine i kinda got it from my friend but some of the ideas in it are mine but what ever!!!! yay! (evil look) time to die kool-aide dude! IF ITS THE LAST THING I DO!!!!!! Kool aide dude: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

"welcome back to cat news!" firestar screamed.

(some random person known as Kaya walks in)

"Yo diggity doggity!" Firestar screamed.

"ahhhhh!" Kaya screamed running out the door.

(kaya walks back in) "wait did you just say yo diggity doggity?"

"yeah!" Firestar said STILL screaming.

(some random person known as Paige walks in)

"okay whats going on? Oh hey firestar aren't you a little presious kitty! Yeeeaahhh! Yeeaaahhh!"

(kool-aide dude walks in)

"oooooohhhhhh yyyyeeeeeeaaaahhhh!" the kool aide dude said.

(everyone stares at him oddly)

"oh c'mon I'm awesome!" the kool-aide dude screamed.

(Kaya and Paige have a evil look pulling out giant straws out of their pockets)

"oooohhhhhhhhhhh nnnnooooooo!" the kool-aide guy screamed while the two Random people started drinking the kool-aide dude.

"hey guys!" silverstream meowed walking in.

"oh hey weather?" firestar asked.

"well I quit. But what ever. TODAY IS SNOWY! GO OUTSIDE AND GO WALK ON THE ICE THEN FALL THROUGH THEN GET COLD AND SWIM WITH DA FISHIES!" silverstream meowed brushing her soft fur.

"I stole rusty and smudge and brought them to the future! Mwahahahaha!" Vlad a random person screamed.

"oh cool! I wanna see myself cuz i'm worth it!" Firestar screamed grabbing smudge and rusty.

"well commercials I have to straighten this mess up. Who are you? And you? And you?"

Commercials. La la la blah blah blah

"welcome back!" sandstorm greeted.

"Ronald McDonald is soooo HOT!" some random guy screamed.

"then tis true! I have a story! Lets send it to the press!" Paige screamed running out the door.

"well in other news a sacred waffle? We're here live with fireheart finder of the waffle."

(Erin Hunter walks in)

"wait a minute wait a minute! What is going on? Fireheart, firestar and rusty are the same person!"

"yeah!" firepaw hissed.

"this is umm..odd, how is there all of you if your all the same cat!"

"i come here cuz I'm awesome!" Firepaw meowed looking at puss n' boots.

"okay fireheart teel us about your sacred waffle." Sandstorm meowed ignoring the huge fight with Erin Hunter and firestar, firepaw, and rusty all speaking Spanish while graystripe was fiddling with a remote control.

"how do I get It back to English!" graystripe hissed whacking the remote control.

"well this is a sacred waffle it has brang us……..WAAAFFFLLLEESSS!" Fireheart screamed running around and around and around and around and around.

-"wow! Now here live with Graystripe to tell us what is most important and least important!" Firestar meowed

"okay a T.V. would be most important against food, a computer would be more important than health care, Internet would be better than Clean water, and Shelter cuz how would we use all our cool stuff, its better than a healthy meal!" Graystripe purred.

(some teacher walks in)

"your stupid graystripe!" The teacher screamed running away.

"pfft wuteva!" Graystripe meowed crawling into a little polly pocket car and driving away.

"commercial break cya later" Silverstream meowed randomly even though she's the weather lady, cat, dog, what ever!

Commercials.

"no kaya that's my spatula!" Paige screamed "no its mine!" vlad screamed "no its MINE!" kaya screamed whacking the other random people.

"oh my god! Another dunkaroo on the floor! This must mean!" Paige screamed.

"mean what? Mean what!" Kaya screamed.

"THE ICE AGE IS COMING! AAHH!" Paige screamed.

"why'd everybody leave?" Puss n' boots meowed scared"

la da la da!

(end for todays cat news!)

* * *

Next chapter- well suggest a idea if you like! cuz i'm running out kinda! sorta! 


	5. Please read this

A chapter not related to cat news.

What I think of flames.

Listen people I don't appreciate flames. And you guys seriously IT'S A RANDOM STORY! Does it really matter about history and crap like that? And like I said….ITS A RANDOM STORY! Please keep your thoughts to yourself abouit mean comments I don't like cuz its making me not want to update. And one more thing. Hopefully I just will update any ways (this is no threat or anything okay?) but if I see a flame I wont update for awhile cuz it puts me over the edge and it makes me sooo mad my head explodes. But you guys people have feelings too, and I'm spending my time writing this stuff while I could be doing something maybe funner. So please if you would no flames cuz I don't want to write another flame chapter with me freaking out, really you guys its not fun. Well c'ya later.

If you agree to a flame free area, please update, or not, I don't care, but I think flamers are just mean. YEAH FLAMERS OUT THERE YOU HEARD ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Y'all have a nice day!


	6. to my friend! green macaroni!

**_Hey cat news has a new look, if u liked the old one tell me! And I'll continue on with the old 1. oh by da way, Oddsponge13 owns the dude called "vlad" I don't! oh and this chapter is dedicated to my friend cause she likes my quote "green macaroni" and Bearbert is in it! And now! The show begins! Da! Da! Da! La! La! La!_**

**Squirrelpaw**: welcome to cat news!

**Leafpaw:** my mommy and daddy aren't here cause they went to paris."

**Squirrelpaw**: Bearbert ripping the forest? We're here with tigerstar.

**Tigerstar**: well first of all Bearbert is ripping the insides of-

**Bluestar interrupts**: GREEN MACARONI!

**Tigerstar**: like I said tearing the insides of THE MEOW-MIX MOBILE!

**Leafpaw fluffening her fluffy fur**: Fascinating, Silverstream weather?

**Silverstream:** well you morons can't look out the window and you never will! Its cloudy! Spottedleaf has a vision though! Check it out!

**Spottedleaf:** hey I'm spottedleaf! Graystripe wrote a book about his great adventure! As we all think he got stolen by two-legs, or did he?

**Graystripe:** well as you know I got kidnapped by two-legs! But really they were my owner when I was a kitty pet! I'm actually smudge with a really convincing jacket!

**Leafpaw**: that's great! Today we are all celebrating Starclans new "welcome to starclan! Hope you had a wonderful death!" sign! We're here with half dead brightheart!

**Brightheart sighs**: well this is the sign! Its shiny and everything! So don't look in thew sky you'll get the shiny disease!

**Squirrelpaw**: truly amazing! Oh hey Vlad!

**Vlad**: heeeey Squirrelpaw, remember we were supposed ta have dinner! Together…

**Squirrelpaw**: I know! But you're a evil ghost or scientist dude and I'm a cat… is so different…

**Vlad**: FINE! I'll just eat dinner with my mommy!

Vlad runs away.

Commercial break.

**Leafpaw**: I hate you! You hate me! Lets all go and kill barney! With a big fat 2by4 whack him in the head! Say good bye cuz barneys dead!

Camera dude: ummm ur on air…

**Leafpaw**: oh yes that's right! Sorry guys! Any who! Snoopy wants to talk to us today! Snoopy!

**Snoopy**:…

Cricket cricket

**Squirrelpaw**: well umm... anyhow! Moomert has a moophecy (prophecy for the moo crew)

**Moomert**: well moo moo milk shall read you to moovic, moomert will save us all, mooke will poke moomert with a stick, moobaa will stop mooka, moowaf will make waffles, and in the end mooey will bake us all cookies!

**Leafpaw**: well folk that's it for today's show! Cause my mommy and daddy aren't here!


	7. tells a little secret

FIRESTAR: hello and welcome back to cat news!

BLUESTAR: umm can I take your oreder?

FIRESTAR: oh yeah I would like a small fries and a mouse kids meal!

CAMERA DUDE: get off the phone this is cat news idiot!

BEARBERT: Here's a llama there's a llama another little llama! Fuzzy llama little llama! Llama, llama duck!

SANDSTORM: okay then, well viewers of cat news dad a da la la la I am here to announce my retirement of my job, and to replace me, silverstream.

SILVERSTREAM: what me? Finally! Well if you want to hear the news learn to read cause there is such thing as the newspaper!

-SCREEN GOES ALL GRAY

some random thing says: technical difficulties.

Commercial break.

SANDSTORM: welcome back I have a new person to replace me! GRAYSTRIPE!

(graystripe walks in with a twix bar)

(everyone looks at the extremely shiny wrapping the twix bar is in)

sandstorm twitches…

FIRESTAR: Give it to me!

GRAYSTRIPE: ahhhhh! Help! Help! Help!

SANDSTORM: graystripe…

GRAYSTRIPE: hubba hubba hubba…

Graystripe drools while sandstorm holds a shiny nickel.

SANDSTORM: if you want it, give me the chocolate bar.

Graystripe looks at his chocolate bar, then looks at the shiny pretty nickel, then looks at the shiny chocolate bar wrapped up all neatly, then he looks at the nickel one more time.

GRAYSTRIPE: okay here.

Graystripe hands the chocolate bar

Sandstorm hands the nickel.

SANDSTORM: well now, tigerstar is dating bluestar? We're here live.

Tigerstar in his undies walking to the fridge and grabs a beer.

TIGERSTAR: ahhhh!

Tigerstar drops his bear and runs to his room and locks the door…

(mumbles from inside the room.)

Tigerstar: bluestar my little more-than-just-a-friend!

Bluestar :my little tigey wigey… what will we tell the press about the kits?

FIRESTAR: well there we have it! And thank you for watching cat news da! Da! Da! LA LA LA!

CREDITS

(weird image that shows Vlad, vlads a guy, having a tea party with toucan sam.

* * *

hello! FLAME FREE ZONE! you flame me... and my head will go boom, and i will continue with my story! so HA HA HA! i need ideas people! so if u want a idea please tell me (if i dont use, i have on clue wut ur talking about or i cant think of anything for r awsome idea! if u write 1...) 


	8. Graystripe little Angel

Graystripes little angel.

Graystripe: welcome back! Today I got a new Tonka truck! Vrrrooom! Vvrrrrooomm!

Firestar : alrighty then! Silverstream weather?

Silverstream walks in with a bunch of chains around her neck and two rings on each finger.

Silverstream: yo like my bling? Just one the lottery ticket YO! Today its raining money$$

Firestar looks out the window.

Firestar: oh cool its raining donuts.

Graystripe screams: doneynuts! (doh-ne-nuts)

Graystripe runs out and finds george bush in a little fluffy yellow coat and puts him in a little basket.

Graystripe: whos my little georgy?

G.B: I am…

Graystripe: yes you are! Yes your are! Yes you aaarrrrreee!

Firestar: recently Cloudtail is back in the business!

Cloudtail: Firestar went to dinner with Spottedleaf tee hee!

Cloudtail runs away, firestar chases him.

SANDSTORM WATCHING T.V.

Sandstorm: you'll be running away from me firestar!

Sandstorm grabs a baseball bat with Barney attached to the end of it.

Barney: why wont any body help me!

CAT NEWS

Firestar: any who! Tigey Wigey is… Married? We're here live!

Tigerstar: yeah what ever this is my wife Bluestar!

(firestar vomits)

(sandstorm vomits)

(graystripe vomits)

(G.B vomits)

G.B: MOOOMMY! I want my MOOOMMMYY!

Graystripe holding G.B: its okay…its okay…aww do you have a dirty dyper?

G.B sucks his thumb.

G.B: yes…waaaaa!

Graystripe changes G.B's oversized dirty dyper.

G.B starts playing with his fisher price toys

G.B: wheee! Giddy-yap Tigger!

Sandstorm walks in with her baseball bat with barney attached to it.

Firestar: any who! Starclan blew up? Everyone in starclan went to starclan-starclan? We're here live with Yellowfang!

Yellowfang: wak wak waka wak wak wak wak waka.

(weird voice) LVL 3!

Firestar: okay fine! So what! Yellowfang is pac man! Big whoop!

Yellowfang: wak wak waka waka wak woooooooooooo!

Firestar: awaka woo wak?

Yellowfang: wak.

Firestar: WAKA WAK WAK WAKA WAKA WAK WOO?

LVL 4!

Yellowfang: wak.

G.B: muahahahaha! I am VLAD! Turns into Vlad

G.B turns into Vlad.

Firestar: umm…Vlad you just said.. "muahahahaha! I am Vlad! Turns into Vlad." Aren't you gonna do anything?

Vlad: well toucan Sam, if you want to be a duck, you have to stay a duck because turning you into a duck is very hard, now if and when you are tired of being a duck I can turn you into a goose! Nothing else, now, you have to stay a goose because it is very hard to turn you into a goose because… it just is… now if and when you get tired of being a goose I can turn you into a parrot! Now you have to stay a parrot because turning you into a parrot is very complicating, more harder than turning you into a goose or a duck, now if and when you get tired of being a parrot I can turn you into a duck!

Firestar: just shut-up. well people! thats the end of todays show!

* * *

hello! hope y'all are enjoying my cat news series. few things to tell you. the whole "wak waka awak woo" thing it was a fight firestar and Yellowfang had! they we're really mad at eachother. secound. i do not hate G.B (please tell me u no wut G.B stands for i got kinda lazy). third of all, the whole toucan sam and the duck-goose-parrot-duck-goose-parrot ect... thing forget it oooooooo!!!!!! i haev magical powers ooooo!!! you will forget the duck thing ooooo...you dont know what i am talking about any more ooooo!!!!! lol have a nice day! next chapter sneak peak preview.

"hello sir" "good day, i would like a plane ride to disneyland!" "alright when would you like it?" "right now!" "oh i'm sorry the plane was sold out" "how could that happen?!" "oh some crazy rich person bought the plane ride for all his cats." "oh" "yeah"

Okay this may not happen, asking if i can right this! (my friend thought of it and i thought i could be able to write it in a fanfic) so i'll ask...heerrr...sometime sooooonne..or lets hope she reviews and tells me! (oddsponge13 Fans a tragic thing happened, oddsponge13 has swallowed a spork! thats why she hasn't been writing her stories for awhile, luckily the spork is almost out of her throat so yeah. luckily oddsponge can still review stuff!


	9. Cat news, vacation!

CAT NEWS_ vacation_! Starring… VLAD!

"lets go to Disneyland!" Vlad randomly screamed running to the airport.

"look at our little Vladdie run…" Squirrelpaw, Vlad's wife meowed.

"I got the ticket!" Vlad screamed running around in circles.

"yeah but what about us…cats?" Fruit loop meowed

"oh you can stay with the suitcases like normal cats!" Vlad said mixing chocolate with broccoli "maybe I shall create, TASTY FOOD!!"

"yeah but uhh…there's giant EEEVVILL dogs which will eat us down there!" Mr. Shnuffles cried.

Cartoons, anime people, ect… start jumping out the closet.

"Have no fear! For puss n' boots is here!!" puss n' boots not so evil, evil twin sister screamed "oh wait… SPOTTEDLEAF N' BOOTS!!"

spottedleaf n' boots walks up to Vlad and tells him what to do.

Vlad makes the whole evil laugh look, you no where they look taller and theres like a shadow thing and everything…

"MUAHAHAHAHA!" Vlad screamed checking out the Barbie website.

AIRPORT

"hello I would like a flight to Disneyland right now please." Some random dude said

"oh I'm sorry sir but…the plane has sold out." The flight lady said calmly

"how could that happen?!" the random dude screamed

"oh some crazy rich dude bought the plane for him and his cats."

IN THE PLANE.

"look fruit loop! We're high in the sky! High in the sky! High in the sky! I can touch the clouds! And since there's no laws of physics I'm going to light this can of gasoline on fire!

IN SPACE

"AAAHHHH" same dude named shadow screamed

PLANE

"Vlad nooooo!!!!" sandstorm screamed, it was too late Vlad jumped out of the plane

"NO LAWS OF PHISICS…..ROCKS my little furry pink SOCKS!" Vlad screamed.

"skydiving!! HOOORRRAAAYYY!!!!!" graystripe screamed beside Vlad

To be continued… DUN DUN DUN. yeah that's right… to be continued!

* * *

Heeellloooo! Bringin' back the old Christmas spirit! To my fried who probably will read this…Oddsponge13, you better cough out that stupid spork! Anyhow, any questions or comments? Ask me pllleaase, I'll answer something that will be weird,

Why did Vlad marry a cat? He's a ghost (I think) and Squirrelpaw is a cat (I think).

Answer: Vlad lives in a room with a princess set-up he loves Barbie, and he loves cats (as you probably already know) and Squirrelpaw is like...a normal person! Plus making fun of evil people is fun… or people I don't like or people, people suggest or what ever comes to my mind, it makes the cat news world more weeeiiiirrddd! Have a nice day! And remember! Ummm….. I duno actually…snoopy?

next chapter, Vlad wears white hello-kitty sneakers? find out later!


	10. cat news vacation part 2 the sneakers!

Cat news _vacation_ part 2!

Graystripe pulls out a picnic basket and blanket

"Tea?" graystripe purred

"Yes please, now where is the nearest bathroom?" Vlad asked

"Over there." Graystripe meowed pointing at the ground.

"Wait the ground…oh dear…" Vlad said

"What" fruit loop screamed

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH" vlad screamed.

(Vlad and all his cats randomly stop right in front of the ground)

"Well lucky us!" graystripe purred walking in the air, then started to break dance

(Thunk) all the cats fell down

"wheeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!" Vlad screamed running off.

"Vlad come back!!!" Firestar hissed chasing Vlad.

THE NEXT DAY

"Do I have to wear this leash?" Vlad asked firestar trying to tie his white hello kitty sneakers.

"cause you do, and why do you have white hello kitty sneakers?"

"Cause I like them"

"Hey why do you have white hello kitty sneakers?" Squirrelpaw meowed confused

"Because I like them!"

"heeeyyy, why do you have white hello kitty sneakers?" Cloudtail asked

"Because I like them!"

"Hey nice sneakers" silverstream giggled.

(Vlad starts to cry)

IN DISNEYLAND

"Let's go on the SMALL WORL AFTER ALL RIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Vlad screamed trying to dart off, but falls to the ground because he's wearing a leash.

"Why are you making me wear this!!!!!!!!" Vlad screamed putting hot sauce in brambleclaws eyes.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH" brambleclaw screamed

ON THE RIDE

(Vlad and his kitties walk onto the ride)

"WAAA" Vlad said crying because the talking mechanical dolls scared him

"Its okay…" silverstream meowed petting Vlad.

(Ride stops)

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" Vlad cried

(All dolls turn evil and pull out knives)

"aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh! Get me out!" Vlad screamed running into the emergency exit.

In the background _"it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small world after all, it's a small, small world…it's a world of-"_

Fruit loop screams "WOULD YOU STUPID DOLLS SHUT UP! YOUR SO ANNOYING AND WORSE YET YOU"RE SCARING MY VLADDIE POO!"

To be continued…

* * *

Next chapter I wont cut off so much I'm just in a rush cause I need to write as many things as possible before my brother takes over my computer and starts playing this game I got and worse yet I got a new monitor and I think my brother really wants to use it so I'm really freaked out because my brother is going to play on this computer forever! But yet I'm so hyper from eating so much cake! I'm typing so fast right now! Okay oddsponge13…(I no she'll read this) YOU BETTER SPIT THAT SPORK OUT! As you can tell I'm kinda mad cause my friend was eating cake with a spork and she swallowed it! Why a spork, like a why not a spoon, or a fork! Well next chapter, the vacation will hopefully end so I can start a chapter with the Pillsbury guy! (yes I do use peoples ideas…if I no wut to rite) I DON'T CARE ABOUT SPELLING AT THE MOMENT!! 


	11. CAT NEWS IS BACK!

CAT NEWS IS BACK!!!  
(and we are using the first way I've made cat news!!)

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" sandstorm purred

"its been months! We're sorry about the long wait! We went to to the mall and shopped for days" Firestar said

"This just in Bluestar just had her kits (in starclan cause she's dead) their names are Puffkit, Fluffkit and Pillowkit! They are all girls!" Cloudtail purred

"lets hear Silverstream with the weather!" Sandstorm meowed.

"I just had kits… they're names are Wavekit, Splashkit, and jewelkit. I can't get mad infront of the kits but all I can say is that its raining outside and I found out its going to snow tomorrow so get all the fresh prey as you can."

"wow silverstream is a goo parent!" Firestar meowed

"yeah better than u terd face!" Sandstorm screamed throwing a chocolate bar at Firestar.

"HEY! What was that for u evil-" Firestar hissd getting cut off my sandstorm

"oh be quiet we're on air!" Sandstorm meowed.

"errm you guys might wanna go to you're office…" Cloudtail meowed started to cut himself.

"why?" sandstorm and Firestar said running to there office.

"BLUESTAR!" sandstorm screamed

"TIGERSTAR!" Firestar screamed.

"what are you doing?" Firestar and sandstorm said at the same time.

"we where trying to hide our kits from Spottedleaf… she wants to kill them because they look to much like tigerstar…" Bluestar meowed sadly.

"I'll take care of them!" silverstream purred grabbing the 3 kits and setting them beside her own.

"well that's settled we'll come back in a few weeks, we have to calm down spottedleaf…"

"now back to the news!" Cloudtail meowed.

"Windclan is having a problem with a bear called bearbert were here live with Brambleclaw." Sandstorm meowed really serious.

"yeah well this is bearbert." Brambleclaw meowed pointing at bearbert.

(bearbert starts eating a bunch of trees and using his chainsaw to destroy leafs)

"hi bearbert what do you have to say about tearing apart windclan…?" Brambleclaw asked.

(bearbert thinks for a moment)

"I'm gonna eat you now." Bearbert screamed shoving Brambleclaw in his mouth.

"nothing happened Brambleclaw is alright." Firestar meowed.

"hey guys sorry I'm late…" Graystripe meowed walking in.

"why are you so late?" Firestar asked

"I was drawing cats dumb idiot!" Graystripe purred then slapped Firestar.

"here's tigerstar with a better weather report!" Graystripe meowed coming closer and closer to the camera.

"Hi every one I am going to tell you the- BLUESTAR STOP! Weather its raining! Okay? Look out the window and- BLUESTAR STOP IT! As you can see its raining! So get off your butt and be a little less lazy and look outside and tell the- BLUESTAR!! Weather yourself! BLUESTAR STOP IT!! You're hurting my tail! Hey turn the music down!!" tigerstar hissed.

_Let the beat wind you up and don't stop until your time is up!_

"bluestar!!!" tigerstar hissed

"okaaaaay then we have to leave now folks! Remember! Cat news will now be updated more often!" Firestar purred hugging a chair.

"happy new year everyone! And I hope y'all had a good Christmas. And may Hawkfrost be happy with his new pink tricycle!" sandstorm meowed

* * *

i am so sorry about not updating sooner i had a writers block for awhile and then i started to draw stuff and a picture made me get out of writers block! i drew silverstream taking care of sandstorms kits and it made me have more ideas! well i will update more latly! since drawing cats makes me get ideas! 


	12. silverstreams kittykat daycare center!

Cat news!!

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" sandstorm purred.

"yeah welcome back!" Firestar repeated.

"today Silverstream just made a kit daycare. She enjoys kits because she says the aren't worthless lazy pieces of mouse dung who stay on the couch all day and she says they are more active and can tell the weather themselves!" Graystripe announced then started to draw cats.

"any how! This just in Firestar went to starclan and stayed at spottedleafs house for the night ooooooohhhhh!!!" Cloudtail said.

"False information!" Firestar said banging his fist on the table.

"BAD KITTY!" sandstorm screamed smacking Firestar with a rolling pin. "that's where you were last night!!!"

"ouch!" Firestar said cowering in the corner of the room sucking his thumb.

"any how we're here live with tigerstar with the weather!" sandstorm purred.

"OH my god! Are you all retards?? Its snowing! SNOW! So if you have kits let them play outside in the snow! Or better yet! Bring the snow indoors! And make little snow castles… BLUSTAR STOP!" tigerstar hissed

(camera moves towards bluestar)

(bluestar is dancing to music turning the music up so you can't hear anything they say only gibberish)

"wak waka wak waka wak wak!!" bluestar said (translation) "what do you want now?"

"waka waka wak wak waka!" tigerstar hissed (translation) "turn down the music!"

"oh sorry!" bluestar meowed.

"that's better" tigerstar meowed.

"commercial break what just happened was a little weird…" Firestar meowed.

COMMERCIALS!!!

"welcome baack!" Graystripe meowed showing off a circle with a nose, eyes and a mouth with cat ears. "it's a kitty!" Graystripe purred so proud of himself.

"that's a wonderful drawing!" Silverstream meowed. "I'm going to put it in a frame!" Silverstream meowed motioning everyone not to make fun of it. Graystripe tried so hard on his picture of a cat.

"well in other news! Windclan is having a problem with… Crowfeather!..?" Sandstorm meowed checking if she read the paper right. "we're here live with Bluestar!"

"anyhow as you can see Crowfeather now has magical powers and is summoning demons and making it rain fire!" Bluestar meowed. "here's tallstar's opinion!"

"yeah just kill him now and get it over with!" tallstar hissed.

"hey bluestar when are you gonna come eat?" Tigerstar meowed putting his head on bluestar's shoulder.

"errmm not infront of the camera Tigerstar!" Bluestar meowed giving tigerstar a kiss.

"EEEWWW!!" sandstorm meowed in disgust.

"GROSS!!" Firestar screamed vomiting in a little bag.

"well c'ya next time!" Silverstream meowed as she playing with a bunch of kits. "hey don't eat yellow snow splashkit!"

* * *

Lol don't eat yellow snow people! please review! and remember please no flames! this is a flame free zooone! if u flame me...well i don't no but i might just put you in cat news. (evil laugh) anyhow if you accually want to be in cat news tell me! and tell me what kind of cat u wanna be (or random person). (smile) review! if u want! 


	13. cat news notice and a weird quiz!

Updated notice for cat news.

Hello fellow readers I will not be updating for a few days. I have a busy schedule at the moment but I will after I finish a few things.

When will I start updating again?

I will be updating probably next week or maybe even this week, and you can count on it.

And now I shall make a quiz for the fun of it…

And no you do not have to answer these.. I was just bored and wanted to write it…

(I'll say my answers cause I feel like it)

Are you a bluestar or a tigerstar?

Do you like bluestar? at times…yes

Do you like the refrigerator?YEAH!

Do you hate it when people poke you?Yes…

ADD HOW MANY YES'S THERE IS!!

Do you like tigerstar?YES but only for his EVILNESS!!!

Do you like poking people?YES  
do you like little fluffy kittens?Who wouldn't?

Add how many…yes's

Are you a Cloudtail or a brambleclaw?

Do you cut yourself?NOOOO

Do you tell on people…ever? (unless its something like someones gonna murder some one…that's OKAY)nope

Do you…get hit by girls?NOPE!!

Add it all up

do you get tortured?nope

If you would be allowed to go on the news would you say "HI" to family members?If I was hyper, yes.

Are you a Silverstream or Sandstorm?

Do you like kittens? Who wouldn't?

Do you hate lazy people?Nope unless they are really lazy…

Do you hate telling weather?Telling weather would be fun…if I told it like silverstream.

Do you get mad at firestar at times?Yeah…

Do you whack people with anything? (could be paper… a 2by4 or a baseball bat or a…you get the picture) yes…at one time in your life, you to, will whack some one with a random object.

Do you like greeting people?…family members…yes…welcoming people…yes wal-mart greeter, NO! (thinks) (flashback) HI and welcome to wal-mart!!


	14. AnotherCatnewschapterlalallaa

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" sandstorm purred

"yes welcome back! This just in, Firestar made out with sandstorm, then silverstream, then got busy with tigerstar! OOOHHHHH!!!!" Cloudtail purred proud of himself.

"False information!!!" Firestar hissed adjusting his new blue tie.

"wanna bet?" Cloudtail purred.

"SURE! 5 mice!" firestar meowed.

(Cloudtail brings out a tape.)

"okay I owe you 5 mice…" firestar coughed.

"but I didn't show the-" cloudtial then got interrupted.

"hey firestar…" bluestar meowed calmly.

"yeah?" firestar replied.

"have you seen my tigerstar?" Bluestar meowed.

"Nope…" firestar meowed.

(WHACK)

"MOOOOMMMYYYY!!!!!" firestar screamed running away putting band-aides on his head.

"okaaaay then….this just in, windclan…is literally off the map. Crowfeather had burnt it down…" firestar said.

"we're here live with tigerstar!" sandstorm purred.

"well as you can see, Bluestar stop it! That windclan is- BLUESTAR STOP IT!! Off the map and- bluestar stop that tickles- here to replace it, Phantomclan and KillerPrincessclan. BLUESTAR!!!" tigerstar said.

"Hello" a white she-cat purred walking up to tigerstar.

"who are you…BLUESTAR STOP IT!!!" tigerstar meowed

"Hi I'm the leader of KillerPrincessclan! My name is… Silverstar." Silverstar purred. "this is my deputy… Startail. And these are her kits, Crackerkit, Softkit and…oddkit."

"very nice. BACK TO YOU FIRESTAR!!! BLUESTAR STOP IT!!!!" tigerstar screamed.

"oookaaaayyyy..COMMERCIAL BREAK!!!" sandstorm meowed.

COMMERCIALS.

"oh yeah that episode was awesome" sandstorm meowed.

"yeah I liked it when that dude, like, ate the grapefruit!" firestar meowed

"hey you guys are ON AIR!" the camera dude said.

"oh yeah, well this just in, graystripe was busy with every she-cat in thunderclan, and starclan, AND shadowclan, and riverclan!!!!" Cloudtail laughed.

"dude that did NOT happen!" Graystripe hissed.

"I was over in the clan Phantomclan/KillerPrincessclan chillin' with my new friend Fluffheart!" graystripe meowed.

"well I saw 1 person do every she-cat!" Cloudtail insisted.

(brambleclaw whistles and walks away)

"hey sorry I'm late you guys!" Squirrelflight meowed in some fancy pink dress.

"why where you SO late? I had to face tigerstar in a thong here!" Sandstorm meowed.

"oh sorry, I went to dinner with my boyfriend, Vlad, WE ARE GETTING MARRIED!!!!" squirrelflight screamed.

"OH MY GOD I am sooooooo gonna make a awesome party for you!" sandstorm squealed.

"okay, anyhow, in other news, today Thunderclan will be offline." Firestar meowed.

"what do you mean 'offline' firestar?" Cloudtail said confused.

"THE THINGA MAJIG GOT DESTROYED MY THE THINGA MAJIG MAKING THUNDERCLAN UN- REACHABLE!!! So we have to fix the server-" firestar said then got cut off.

"dude, thunderclan is NOT a server." Sandstorm hissed.

"oh yeah I was thinking about my... chatroom… for thunderclan…" Firestar said.

"well I'll see you next time on the next episode of CAT NEWS!" sandstorm purred.

(end of show)

"firestar, we missed something in todays show… OH NO THE WEATHER!!!" sandstorm screamed.

* * *

I UPDATED! ENJOY! (although..i may noit update this week i have alot to do...) 


	15. EPIC cat news chapter ENJOY!

Hello Everyone, i am SOOOO sorry i haven't been updating that much...I've been playing This awesome game and i have had alot of homework and stuff and i was on Writers block..oh the horror...anyhow. I wont be updating much anymore. But here is a Epic cat news chapter, i added a poem i wrote into it, its really awesome, i used it for one of my projects, as well as Graystripes poem...I saw you, and i went moo, i saw me, and i went, whheeeeee!!! ) anyhow, I hope you will love this chapter, i have added many of my ideas, and funny situations i have had which worked perfectly with the story. Have fun reading! may the randomness be with you.

* * *

Epic Cat News Chapter

"hello and welcome back to cat news its been moons…we got cut off the television for awhile SORRY!!!" sandstorm meowed

"today will be an epic cat news adventure. Where… many of Evilkillerprincess' ideas will all be in one chapter! Even if the don't relate to this" Firestar purred

"YAH! Just like drakstripe and tigerstars AND bluestars relashionship together." Cloudtail purred

"do you mean they are all married together…" Firestar asked

"YES!!!" Cloudtail purred

"did you have to tell everyone that hunny?" tigerstar meowed "oh BTW im a girl now because I feel sexy when im a girl wearing dresses hunny!" (tigerstar starts eating Darkstripes froot loops)

"tigerstar those are MY froot loops" Darkstripe hissed

"but honey, froot loops are sooooo sexy!" Tigerstar purred

"whatever…" darkstripe meowed

knock knock knock

"COME IN! hey guys it's the Pizza Hut dude WHERE'S THE MONEY!!" Sandstorm meowed

"that will be 99999,9999.99 please." The Pizza Hut dude said happily.

door slams

"AND THAT'S HOW YOU STEAL PIZZA!" Cloudtail purred

cricket

"that's NOT nice" Firestar meowed "anyhow, Silverstream weather!"

"I hate you its sunny you lazy people LOOK OUT YOUR WINDOW!!!" Silverstream hissed

"nice weather report!!! Now to you Toiletstar, I mean, Tigerstar" Sandstorm meowed putting on lipgloss "lets go cutie we have a date!"

"okay darling" Firestar purred

"GROSS!!!!" Cloudtail said quickly packing his camera and phone into his bag "ohh this is going to be juicy news"

"today crowfeather- BLUESTAR! DARKSTRIPE! STOP IT!- started a Show, its so weird because all he does in it is make it rain fire and burn cats he doesn't like to dust…STOP IT!!" tigerstar meowed

"don't worry cutie! The camera's are off and we can lick the phone together" Bluestar and darkstripe meowed grabbing the tempting phone.

"aww man dude how can I resist the hotness of the phone?" Tigerstar meowed licking the phone.

"uhhmm anyhow! Today we bought a new guitar for Graystripe!" Sandstorm purred

-graystripe crying happily-

"you guys are so great, I love this guitar, it's the one I wanted, its BETTER than the one I wanted I love it…this time I promise I want sing the juicy fruit song with my guitar, this is the best birthday I've had EVER!" Graystripe purred

"we hear you have a poem Graystripe!" Firestar meowed "wait sandstorm we late for our date"

"OH RIGHT!" sandstorm meowed

-firestar and sandstorm leave while Cloudtail sneaks behind them-

"well yeah I have a poem, let me read it to you!!!" Graystripe purred

" I make Peanuts cry,

Now stand there as I say goodbye,

You see, I ate a fly,

But I prefer making peanuts cry,

Whats that?

Is that my mat?  
uh oh a peanut stole my mat,

And I no longer have my hat,

I know this poem is so lame,

But 'cause of my fame…

I'll be alright for I am Graystripe.

And I don't like Squirrelflight,

Now watch me as I say MOO lalalalala MOO lalalalala MOO!

And now my poem is over so SHOO!"

"that was a awesome poem Graystripe!" Silverstream purred "HIGH FIVE!"

-high five-

"hey Silverstream…I have a confession to make…" Graystripe meowed sadly

"what? What is it Graystripe?" Silverstream meowed

"I'm cheating on you." Graystripe meowed crying

"AWW!! No worries dude, I know everything because im part of starclan…though, im not happy what you do with her at night!" Silverstream meowed

"oh so you've seen us…uhmm….uhhhh…"Graystripe stalled

"brush each others hair? YAH!" Silverstream laughed

"I HATE YOU!! THIS IS NATIONAL TELEVISION!" Graystripe hissing running away.

"I hate myself now!" Silverstream meowed.

"oooo you put that cheese in the right spot!!! OHH YAAAHH BUESTAR!! Ohh not you too darkstripe"

"oh my god what are you doing tigerstar?" Squirrelflight hissed

"we putting cheese on eachother nose, I find it sexy, why ask?" Tigerstar meowed

"can you please, wear something, I can't stand you wearing that thong Tigerstar" Squirrelflight hissed

"oh sorry, I thought you'd be fine with me wearing it, being my ex and all…" Tigerstar meowed

"im leaving you gross me out" Squirrelflight meowed

"I KNOW YOU HAVE GROSS FANTASIES ABOUT ME I STALK YOU IN YOU'RE DREAMS!!!" tigerstar meowed

"LEAVE ME ALONE!! I don't fantasy about you…only my hot husband" Squirrelflight purred fainting at the thought of Vlad.

"okay we're back, wow it's a mess, this just in, Cloudtail got into a very bad accident and we found this tape with him!" Firestar meowed "lets watch!"

-tape goes into TV-

"today im going to watch Sandstorm and Firestar go on their date. Its going to be one weird night…oh my god EWW EWW EWW EWW EWW Im not even going to point my camera at them! THEY DRESSING UP AS FAIRY PRINCESSES GROSS!!!!"

-TV turns off-

-cough cough-

"uhmm commercials…" Firestar said shifting uncomfortably.

Commercials.

Lala

Lala

Lala

Lalla

Oooohhh cool Cat News is BACK!

"im just trying to get into my creative mode you know?" Squirrelflight meowed

"errmmm We're on…" the camera dude said

"oh right sorry." Squirrelflight said

"today we're here with Leafpool with a magical prophecy, YOU'RE ON LEAFPOOL! Don't embarrass yourself again like the time when you went on Fuzzy Kitty time." Firestar meowed

"well I have this prophecy you see, let me say it for you…_rusty, firepaw, fireheart and Firestar will be one_ OOPS!! Wrong prophecy that was a few chapter ago which I didn't share the prophecy because im a stupid medicine cat. The real prophecy is…_the stars are coming…but not like the celebrity kind of stars more like the starclan stars…I make no sense oh my goodness I hate telling prophecies its so lame._"

"uuhhmm…cool…HIT IT BLUESTAR!" Sandstorm meowed.

"Hello, Im starting my own Phone licking lessons." Bluestar purred "only 1cent per minute."

"THAT IS WICKED AWESOME!" Rain said

"Who are YOU?" Firestar meowed

"Im uhhh Rain…from the Star Legion this is My friend which is also in the legion, Silver" Rain meowed

"uhhmmm and why aren't you with starclan?" Firestar meowed

"……………………..What's starclan?" Rain meowed

"…."

"what was THAT!" Rain meowed

"thatwasmeimafastmotiontalkingcricketandimhyperhyperhyperwhee" the cricket said.

"okay then, im leaving now." Rain and silver meowed "I smell KFC…"

"well that's all for this epic chapter ermm show of cat news have fun everyone!" Firestar meowed happily.

* * *

Please, Read and Review! no flames PLEASE NO FLAMES...i hate flames they EVIL...they so evil, that if you send one, tigerstar will come to your house and steal your couch. 


	16. DADADALALALA welcome back 2 catnews

Hey! i wrote another chapter. I feel like writing so yaaahhh!!! ANyhow please enjoy, Read and then review, please, no flame either.

* * *

-Previews-

* * *

AND NOW FOR YOUR FEATURE PRESENTATION!

* * *

"hello and welcome back to cat news." Firestar purred 

"today we have a guest star, everyone come and welcome, Smudge" Sandstorm meowed.

"heyyyyyyyyyy!!!!' Smudge purred

"Hello smudge how do you live with the two legs?" Cloudtail asked.

"well, I steal their socks and put them on my head and dance around and stuff and then they all like "what the heck is smudge doing?" and then I keep dancing and start playing the guitar and then they leave me alone and be quiet and phone their friends." Smudge purred. "BACK TO YOU FIRESTAR!"

"today we have bad news, The F.F.S (froot loop forces squad) is no longer inviting anymore members unless they eat cake"

-everyone bursts unto song-

"HIII sorry I'm late." Squirrelflight meowed

"we don't give a poop if you're late…just don't tell us why!" tigerstar hissed "only I can say stuff like that right Darkstripe hunny?"

"yes Tigerstar" Darkstripe meowed

"I EAT FROOT LOOPS!" Scourge hissed

"I eat people who dress up like froot loops." Smudge purred all proud.

COMMERCIAL BREAK

"hello and I'm here to introduce you with this new mouse trap specially des-"

"I HATE commercials!" Some random guy said

"Turn it back to cat news you idiot, I need to hear the weather" some random dude said

"FINE!"

BACK TO CAT NEWS

"Hello, Silverstream WEATHER"

"Well it's a temperature of 10 degrees what ever the clouds are coming and I hate everyone so much because they wont just look at their window." Silverstream hissed frustrated.

"Well today Britney Spears stole my Chocolate bar!!!" Firestar hissed

"Hey you guys check it OUT!" Graystripe meowed "I CAN PLAY THE MEOW MIX SONG!!"

-Graystripe plays the meow mix song-

-Everyone claps-

-All the fan girls faint while Graystripe winks-

"Man, I love the popularity" Graystripe purred.

"Well we must leave now!! See you on the next cat news chapter ermmmm episode ermm or whatever." Firestar meowed

* * *

Hello! I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER!!!! Review please, no flames, if you have a flame, write it down on a lined peice of paper and lush it down the toilet. 


	17. another great catnews chappie

Hello Im glad to tell you all that this is...a new cat news chapter, please, R&R!!!

* * *

Cat News readers- Have a funky funk fun time this summer!!!!

* * *

"hello and welcome back to Cat news" Sandstorm greeted warmly

"yyyeessssssssssssss welcome BAAACCCCCCCCCKK!!! We ate some waffles earlier today and…well…Brambleclaw ate too many and is now in the hospital!!" Firestar sighed.

"anyhow, Today, some weird dude came and started eating all the Poptarts in Thunderclan, It was TRAGIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Cloudtail purred even though it was a tragic moment…

"This just in, I ate cloudtails Crumpet" Firestar laughed

"HEY GIVE IT BACK!!!" Cloudtail hissed while Firestar opened his mouth and had chunks of Cloudtails Crumpet on his tongue.

"here have it" firestar meowed puking into a bucket

"EWW!!" Cloudtail hissed "this is disgisting looking…yet very tasty…"

"EWW" Sandstorm shrieked as everyone started having a pillow fight

"COMMERCIAL BREAK NOW" Firestar meowed.

Lallalalalla

Lalalallala

Lalallalallaa

Lalalalalala

Lalalalalala

Lalalalala

Lalalalalala

Lalalalalala

OOOOOO cat news…

"hiiiiiiii!" Sandstorm greeted.

"…you're scaring me Sandstorm…" Graystripe meowed poking sandstorm With a stick.

"I don't care…" Sandstorm meowed putting on a really creepy smile

"well you should, anyhow, weather Silverstream."

"WELL!!! You lazy couch potatoes…look out the window, as you can see its SUNNY, let me spell it out for you S-U-N-N-Y SUNNY!! S-U-N-N-Y spells SUNNY!! Do you understand?" Silverstream hissed

"Okay Thanks Silverstream, now an interview with Tigerstar Interviewing himself lets watch." Firestar purred trying to hide his laughter

"hello Tigerstar, Now we know about your sex change why did you have it?" Tigerstar said

-tigerstar moves to other chair-

"well, I didn't have one, I actually dress up as a girl, it makes me feel cute" Tigerstar purred

-tigerstar moves to other seat-

"now, what about your wife and your other lover Darkstripe?" Tigerstar meowed

-tigerstar moves to other seat-

"they're hawt" Tigerstar replied softly.

-tigerstar moves to other seat-

"now what about your phone licking business?" Tigerstar asked.

-tigerstar moves to other chair-

"its going great, oh my phone's ringing I better go bye bye cutie!!" Tigerstar purred

-tape ended-

"wow fascinating" the whole cat news crew (other than tigerstar) said trying to hide there laughter.

"well that's the end of todays cat news see you next time." Sandstorm meowed.

* * *

Hello, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, Please, No Flames...if you flame me...i'll...DIIIEEEE or chuck a frezbie at you!!! 


	18. Welcome Back 2catnews!

Hello!! heres another great chapter!! i hoe you enjoy it!

* * *

No really, i do want you to enjoy it, im not kidding

* * *

R&R PLEASE...i want you to enjoy this chapter

* * *

"welcome back to another great Episode of CAT NEWS!!" Sandstorm shrieked.

"Yes welcome back, this just in, Sandstorm licked Firestar OOOHHHH!!!!!" Cloudtail said with laughter.

"oh STFU Cloudtail (suck the Froster up)" Firestar hissed "its annoying me!!!"

"FINE I WILL STFU!!!" Cloudtail hissed sucking up his froster "mmmmmmmmm.."

"anyhow, Silverstream weather report" Firestar purred

"well today is cloudy!!!! CANT YOU LOOK OUT YOUR FUDGEING WINDOW?!?" Silverstream hissed frustrated.

"Okay great! Now to Tigerstar!" Graystripe purred.

"Hello- STOP IT- today im here to show you- STOP IT- the fire that has just –DARKSTRIPE STOP!- burned down Windclan which is Floating over all the other clans. Tallstar What do you have to say about this?" Tigerstar asked slapping Darkstrripe.

"uhhhh I don't know im dead." Tallstar meowed walking away.

"Darkstipe, Must you groom me while im on the television?" Tigerstar asked warmly.

"sorry…I just…I just…Think you are so HOT!" Darkstripe meowed hugging Tigerstar.

"uhhmm your still on Air…" The camera dude said

"well then watch this!" tigerstar meowed as he started making out with Darkstipe

"EWWW YOU ARE ONE SICK KITTY TIGERSTAR!!!" The camera dude said running away

"commercial break I think im gonna get SICK!" Graystripe cried.

Commercials

LALALA

ALLLALALALLALALA

OOOOOO cat news..

"Hello!!!!! This just in, Sandstorm was Doing naughty stuff with firestar's tail!!!!" Cloudtail squealed.

"FALSE INFORMATION!!!" Firestar and sandstorm hissed whacking Cloudtail.

"well that Concludes our Cat News Episode for today!" Graystripe said proudly- His First complicated word, 'Concludes'.

-cats news crew clapping proudly from Graystripes fantastic accomplishment, no other cat has been able to say 'concludes' that awesome.-

* * *

I hope you liked this chapter!!! PLEASE NO FLAMES!!! If you do, I'll...THROW A FUDGESICLE AT YOU!!! MUAHAHAHAHA

) Please review, No flames, or i'll throw Random Objects at you

-EvilKillerPrincess


	19. CATNEWSCREWLALALA

Cat news

"hi welcome back to cat news." Sandstorm greeted.

"yeesss hello, today we now have a super awesome thing where if you like, want to be in the cat news crew, give us a call at 'click the review button and say I want to be in the cat news crew' come on it will be fun." Graystripe meowed playing with his guitar

"this just in Graystripe licked a phone!!!!' Cloudtail screamed.

"False information!! Wait why would I want to lick a phone?" Graystripe said tucking into his chair.

"I know you licked a phone I saw you!! I even recorded you and stuffs!!! Here lemme show everyone" Cloudtail purred

-recording thing goes on-

"_Ooo Firestar you are soooo hot" Spottedleafe purred "yah I know I am. I love you spottedleaf" Firestar meowed. "what about sandstorm?" Spottedleaf asked "well…I love her too!!!" Firestar meowed "ohhh…what ever lets go to my room" Silverstream meowed._

"oh uhhmm wrong recording…fudge I wanted to save this for the end" Cloudtail meowed.

"FIRESTAR!! HOW DARE YOU!!!!" Sandstorm hissed whacking Firestar with a pillow.

"hey hey hey hey now…she doesn't mean anything to me, I was saying that stuff to uhhh…practice for my audition to the uhh….play…yah…the play it s a uhh musical…" Firestar said lying.

"aww how cute I want to come see it!" Sandstorm meowed hugging Firestar.

"EWW!!" Brambleclaw meowed "STOP MAKING BABIES!!!"

"we're just hugging Brambleclaw…" Firestar meowed staring at Brambleclaw oddly

"uhh uhhmm yah I knew that…" Brambleclaw meowed.

Commercials.

"hello welcome back." Sandstorm mewed

"WWEATHHEERR!!!" Firestar screamed running away from tigerstar.

"its flippin cloudy." Silverstream hissed.

"tigerstar is now going to show us a great time." Firestar meowed

"now this is how u have a great time, put this mouse trap on a string head level…then put a nice dinner on the table (make sure the mouse trap is near) and then call you boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife. And then…they should walk right into the mouse trap and it should catch their nose!! WATCH!!!" tigerstar said.

"bluestar darling come here" Tigerstar said giggling.

"ohh its wonderfull tiger-AHH MY NOSE!!!" bluestar screamed in pain.

screen goes all fuzzy

"well that ends this cat news episode stay tuned for more funky funk fun!" Graystripe purred.

* * *

Hope you enjoyed. not my greatest chapter...sorry 'bout that...i wrote this at 1:54am...so tired...please no flames and please call to join the cat news crew at 'click the review button and say I want to join the cat news crew and submit it..." then...yah...you can be part of the cat news crew, you choose your name, and how you want to act, and who you would like to work with, i'll try to fit you in !!! 


	20. we welcome, the new cat news crew!

Welcome to cat news!!

"hi and welcome to cat news!!" sandstorm greeted happily

"today, we have a few new members to out crew! Smallstream, Silverstream's weather reported helper thingy…" Graystripe meowed while Silverstream gasped

"are you…REPLACEING ME?!?!? HOW DARE YOU!!!" Silverstream hissed

"no!! she's just your buddy." Graystripe meowed

"HI! Im Smallstream!!" Smallstream meowed starting to lick her giant lollipop "don't you just loooooooove lollipops?"

"uhh yah..okay…and now, our second new member, Iceflight, she'll be working with sandstorm and Firestar, and of course, me." Graystripe meowed happily.

"Hi! Its good to be here!!!" Iceflight meowed "today, leopardstar, well she ate a wallet and now she can tell the future, like what starclan does!!! Were here live with Tigerstar!"

"hello! Bluestar stop it. Hello leopardstar bluestar stop it. So we can see you can, bluestar stop it! NOW!!! Tell the future, lets see what you got, BLUESTAR STOP IT!" Tigerstar meowed

"well in 3 secounds you're gonna wet yourself, have fun." Leopard star meowed while tigerstar wet himself.

"aww fudge…"Tigerstar meowed, then Darkstripe came up and grabbed the microphone.

"what else can you do?" Darkstripe asked putting lipstick on tigerstar.

"uhhmm…in 5minutes you are going to fall off a cliff and tigerstar is going to be devastated but you wont die. You will just be hurt." Leopardstar meowed "NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!!!"

"great report, Silverstream, Smallstream, Weather please!" Firestar meowed.

"ITS RAINING YOU LAZY PEOPLE!!!" Silverstream hissed.

"YAH!! ITS RAINING SO SO SO SO SO SO SO, WHY DON'T YOU JUST GRAB A PEANUT AND EAT IT!? INSIDE!!" Smallstream meowed all hyper like.

"high five!!!" Silverstream meowed while she gave a high five to smallstream.

"This just in, Firestar, as his weird self, went to the club and…" Cloudtail starts giggling "he…Kissed some random girls and was all like WOOOO!!!! I ROCK!! IM SO HOT!!!" Cloudtail squeled running off.

"False information!" Firestar hissed "THAT WAS NOT ME!!! It was…the one…the only…Cloudtail!!! YOU WERE MAKING IT UP SO YOU COULD SAY STUFF ON CAT NEWS!!!" Firestar hissed.

"nu uh, its you I video taped it." Cloudtail meowed.

"…I give up you got me…" Firestar meowed

"COMMERCIALS NOW!" Sandstorm hissed "oh hi Squirrelflight."

Commercials.

Da da da la la la!

"mmm…" Firestar meowed walking out of his office while fixing his tie.

"did you just…" Cloudtail got cut off.

"no, no, no…" Sandstorm meowed putting on new lipgloss "nothing happened."

"Well that ends this cat news episode, we hope you all have enjoyed it!!" Iceflight purred.

"and us cat news crew would like to thank our new members who joined us today!!" Graystripe meowed happily. "now, we still are accepting more cat news crew people, just tell us your name you want, who you want to work with, and how you wanna act and stuff, all you have to do is call us at 'click the review button' thanks for WATCHING… CAT NEWS DA DA DA LA LA LA"

* * *

Like Graystripe said, i'd like to thank all those who decided to join the cat news crew! The cat news crew really appreciates the new members! now, if you wanted to be in the cat news crew but didn't get it, that means, well, you didn't tell me the name you wanted. i dont mind if you do not say who you want to work with, i'll just put you some where where there is room. Now, im sorry, but the positions for the weather people and people you want to work for firestar sandstorm and Iceflight, they are full now. theres still Tigerstar, Cloudtail and, if you want, you can ask to make your own station!! but only if you want to join the cat news crew!

I would like to ask everyone not to flame. I haven't been getting them thank god, i just dont want to get any yet. and if your a flamer...if you are going to send me a flame, think of this, People have feelings you know, its not just yourself!!! anyhow please review!!!! (BTW if you flame, i'll throw a frisbe at you! MUA HA HA HA HA).


	21. Cat news is randomly back

Cat news is randomly back again sorry I haven't been updating I have school 50 million e-mails and of course….homework and of course…shopping to do AGGHHH I could make a terribly long list of everything I have been doing but- enough of that lets continue cat news!

* * *

Hi everyone, I'd just like to say its so great to have a little free time to write another cat news chapter- i am so sorry about not updating recently it has been a looong summer full of shopping to do for school and trying to find tennis lessons and stuff. Hopefully my school will not give me too much homework, i love updating cat news. anyhow, I had a review of saying that this sotory should be a little more for people older instead of what it is now. BUt im going to make it stay this way because- so many people have already read it and, of course- who would forget? Firestar would miss you and, we wouldn't want you to miss out on cloudtail shinanagans or however you spell it hehehe. anyhow- just be warned about it awesome funky funk fun content. anyhow! please enjoy this story- please do not tell me about any spelling errors if there is lots- i have got so many things to do and that is the last thing i want to worry about. well enjoy!

* * *

"hello and welcome back to cat news" Firestar purred.

"hey that's MY line!" sandstorm hissed tackling Firestar.

"hey stop it stop it" Cloudtail meowed "this just in ehem" Cloudtail started coughing while Firestar shoved an apple in his mouth. "mnnrrrmmmmmmmrrrnnnn" Cloudtail said attempting to get this apple out of his tiny mouth.

"hehe okay Silverstream weather" Sandstorm meowed.

"hi…before I announce the weather report the stupid cats over there didn't tell you all the new members will no longer be on cat news atleast for awhile… its been a tough week for the writer….okay we don't have a writer WTF!!!! WHO CHANGED MY SCRIPT I WROTE TODAY? Anyhow. ITS SUNNY OUTSIDE OMG!!!!! I told you ALL look outside for heavens sake! If you look outside, you will see that it is sunny. Or rainy or snowy or whatever I don't give a-"

Silverstream got cut off. "Silverstream, sorry to cut you off but my kits are here" Squirrelflight meowed gently patting jaykit "get your paw aff me Squirrelflight just because I cant see doesn't mean I don't know your touching me, stop touching me!" Jaykit hissed "JAYKIT GETTING ANGRY YOU DON'T WANT JAYKIT ANGRY" Jaykit hissed.

"…jaykit sometimes I think you need help" Squirrelflight said in a whisper. Just then jaykit turned into a giant evil apple and started rolling around.

"JAYKIT SQUISH!!! JAYKIT ROLL!!!!!!!" Jaykit screamed.

"oh my gosh commercial break….this is sooo retarded" Firestar meowed.

Commercials.

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm purred

"this just in" coudtail said while Firestar and sandstorm shifted. "Sandstorm said that Graystripe was hot!" Cloudtail purred.

"ohhhhh hehe I thought you meant something else- wait what?" Firestar said.

"who DOESN'T think im hot?" Graystripe meowed "who doesn't love I cute kitty?" Graystripe said.

"Oh yah okay" Firestar meowed.

"im getting to that to." Cloudtail said with a smile. "Firestar went out with spottedleaf nananananannaa" Cloudtail purred.

"OHHH I thought you meant something else okay- wait WHAT!!! FIRESTAR GET OVER HERE NOW!" sandstorm hissed.

"what is it…" Firestar said flinching.

SLAP!

"OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH" Firestar meowed running around in circles.

"I was getting to that as well" Cloudtail meowed evilishly.

"COMMERCIAL BREAK!" Sandstorm hissed.

Commercials.

"WELCOME BACK TO CAT NEWS!!!" sandstorm purred, Cloudtail however, was tied up to a chair with his mouth covered with a piece of tape.

"yes welcome back well me and sandstorm are going to do stuff in that bush over there hehhehe" Firestar said grabbing a square box from his desk, sandstorm did the same.

"what are you guys doing in there" Graystripe asked, creeping up to a bush.

"AHHHHHHHH!!!!" Firestar screamed.

"OH MY GOODNESS WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING!" Graystripe hissed.

"ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK!" Firestar meowed.

To be continued.

Never mind…

"are you two playing pokemon?!?!?!?!?!" Graystripe meowed.

"yes but in a very awesome way cause uhhh…" Firestar stalled- he couldn't think odf a good excuse.

"oh yah we were going to do rock paper scissors but I think its evil, so I decided to play this cause ONE of us has to give tigerstar a BIIIIIGGGGG smoocharoo" Sandstorm meowed.

"Oh okay" Graystripe meowed.

"anyhow- to you tigerstar!" Firestar meowed.

"im standing here in- Darkstripe stop it. Windclan..which is floating on top of something and they are having massive prey problems- Bluestar stop it. What do you have to say about this allstar?" Tigerstar asked.

"its tallstar…but anyhow. It is really bad considering rabbits, have attempted to take over our clan 362 times this week." Tallstar meowed.

"I see, well back to you Firestar" Tigerstar meowed

"come here cutie pie…" Bluestar meowed.

"please don't we're on tv" tigerstar giggles shyly while bluestar started combing tigerstars tail.

"uhh anyhow, cat news will be back someother time because- well. Theres no more news happening here in our fluffy forest!" Firestar purred.

"except for the fact that Firestar made out with sandstorm a few days ago and wouldn't stop until 3 hour later." Cloudtail meowed.

"IM GOING TO KILL YOU!!!" Firestar meowed jumping after Cloudtail.

-screen is all fuzzy and gray-

* * *

Thank you for reading- please review! no flames...please no flames if you flame im going to send a giant acorn to poke you- FOREVER! DUN DUN DDDUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN. 


	22. Cat news! tigerstars new mate!

Hello, today i have added a character, Skycloud, I just had to. I may slowly add people, now that im a little bit more settled and stuff. I will slowly bring back those who where in cat news, now that ive settled a bit more. but at the meantime, im sticking to this many members. dont worry, if you wanted to be in the cat news crew i'll avventually put you in here... i just need to check all my reviews, try to find a nice spot for you...well Enjoy reading please review! No flames, or tigerstar will come and take your refridgerator!

* * *

Cat news

"hello and welcome back to cat news" Sandstorm Greeted.

"This just in, Tigerstar has another mate." Cloudtail purred.

"ANOTHER 1?" Firestar stared in shock.

"SMURF YAH!" cloudtail meowed.

"well, Today, we have to send a gift basket to Tigerstars new mate because she's nice!" Squirrelflight purred, being early for the first time in like, forever.

Firestar, sandstorm, cloudtail and Graystripe stared in shock. "w-w-what?"

Squirrelflight growled. "fine I will do it myself."

"Silverstream, weather please" Graystripe meowed, then he mumbled something into her ear.

"Oh Graystripe you're so funny!" Silverstream giggled. "Anyhow OHHHHHH MYYYYY GOOODDNNEESSS!!! Seriously people look out your window. Seeeee? It's sunny, again, now stop being a couch potato and get active" Silverstream hissed.

At someone's TV.

"but I'm making cupcakes at the same time…."

At cat news.

"unless your making cupcakes at the same time then u can stay because I love cupycakes, yes I do insist on calling them cupycakes." Silverstream meowed happily.

"anyhow, today Graystripe got us all muffins!" Firestar said clapping happily.

"shut up Firestar I'm listening to music…" Graystripe meowed dancing to the beat of the music.

"commercial break we will see you soon!" Firestar purred.

Commercials.

La la ala

Lala

Lalalala

OHHHHHHHH CAT NEWS!

"welcome back, here's Tigerstar with some fancy news." Sandstorm meowed

"today im standing here by this big tree, why? Because it can talk, TREE TALK!!!" Tigerstar said smacking the tree.

"hi I'm Rufus the tree!" the tree said.

"hi I'm Tigerstar, I'm Sexy" Tigerstar meowed.

"Tigerstar, where do you keep your mice?" Skycloud asked. (Skycloud is Tigerstar's new mate)

"uhhhh I don't know, Darkstripe is in charge of that sexylicous job" Tigerstar meowed.

"Tigerstar you turn me on" Darkstripe said walking in with a thong. "you forgot to wear this…" Darkstripe said handing Tigerstar his thong.

"Thank you Darkstripe" Tigerstar meowed, putting on his thong.

-This scene has been deleted due to complete weirdness-

"lets go home Skycloud" Tigerstar giving Skycloud a biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiig lick, Skycloud purred happily.

"uuuhhhhh anyhow, leafpool has a new prophecy HIT IT LEAFPOOL" Graystripe meowed.

"well all stars will fall from the sky, and then grab cloudtail." Leafpool meowed.

Just then all of Starclan came and picked up cloudtail. "YOU HAvE BEEN BAAAAAD!!!!!!" Starclan hissed

"NOOOOO" cloudtail meowed being dragged away.

"uhhh and that concludes this cat news episode, see you next time." Graystripe meowed playing his guitar wildly.


	23. Catnews back in FUNKY funk fun action

Hello please enjoy this Cat news chapter, i added Flamepelt, a very hyper kitty. and i added Smallstream again, Silverstreams partner. Skycloud is stilll in it D I had a great idea review sort of, enjoy it everyone! (please review, no flames though, if you flame...tigerstar will come into a house wearing nothing but a thong and take your chair)

* * *

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm meowed.

"with another great cheesey episode!" Graystripe meowed putting cheese on his cheese which was on his grilled cheese sandwich.

"uhhmm anyhow this just in cloudtail came back to cat news dressed up like a fairy princess, turn the camera to him." Firestar said giggling, Cloudtail just got a taste of his own medicine.

"oh shut up you guys, hey don't point that thing of me, MOOOOOOMMMMMYYY!!!!!!!!!!! WAAAAAAAAA" Cloudtail cried and he hid in the bathroom.

"spazz." Sandstorm purred.

"well, Silverstream weather" sandstorm purred.

"well its DARK outside, WHY? Because its night time!!!" Silverstream hissed.

"yah so why don't you just pack up your froot loops and go?!" Smallstream hissed.

"You're back yay! A partner who agrees with me!" Silverstream meowed glaring at Firestar.

"well, its not like there isn't such things as window jeeze, silly couch potatoes." Smallstream meowed.

"hit it flamepelt" Silverstream purred.

"Hello im here to announce, oh look a squirrel wait here." Flamepelt meowed while she jumped up and down then finally decided to snatch the squirrel. "okay anyhow, Grasytripe put the guitar DOWN I said I'd play mine with you LATER" flamepelt said all bouncy on her chair.

"fine.." Graystripe meowed.

"like I was saying, Tigerstar is…making a scene in the mall, lets take a look." Flamepelt meowed doing an insane air guitar solo.

"we're here today to witness my mate Tigerstar, singing im too sexy in the mall!" Skycloud meowed.

"I'm too sexy, right said fred." Tigerstar purred.

"what do you have to say about this tallstar?" Skycloud asked.

"I'm too sexy for my love too sexy for my love, Love's going to leave me" Tigerstar purred, then quickly put on lipgloss.

"well first of all hes breaking rule 100006: you cant go in the mall in windclan unless you're a windclanian!" Tallstar hissed.

"I'm too sexy for my shirt too sexy for my shirt So sexy it hurts And I'm too sexy for Milan too sexy for Milan New York and Japan!" Tigerstar purred.

"I see I see…anything else?" Skycloud asked giving Tigerstar a quick lick.

"And I'm too sexy for your party Too sexy for your party No way I'm disco dancing" Tigerstar purred.

"yes, I don't like this music, I like old people music" Tallstar meowed.

"really?" Skycloud said hiding her laughter.

"yes, I am quite serious" Tallstar meowed, then started itching himself. "darn kids throwing rocks at me" tallstar meowed walking away.

"im soo seeexyyy it hurts" Tigerstar meowed sitting down.

"awwwww" Skycloud meowed.

"bluestar STOP, you too Darkstripe!" Tigerstar hissed.

"uhhh commercial break!" Firestar meowed.

Comercials.

Lalala

Lala

La

Lalalalala

"Hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm meowed happily.

"this just in, Sandstorm starting making out with a mirror!!!" Cloudtail giggled.

"I cant deny that, I AM so sexy im sizzling." Sandstorm meowed.

"true true…" Firestar meowed.

"Cloudtail stop cutting yourself!" Squirrelflight screamed. "sorry im late" Squirrelflight meowed. "I was on a date."

"AGAIN?" Firestar meowed "I demand to see your mate."

"uhh he's not your style, hes not fashionable" Squirrelflight meowed.

"never mind you have fun" Firestar meowed grabbing a beer.

"well that ends this cat news chapter, stay tuned for the next CAT NEWS EPISODE!" Sandstorm purred.

"I prefer the word concludes" Graystripoe meowed.

"well you know I cant say stuff as good as you!" Sandstorm hissed.

"THE SHOW IS NOT OVER YET!" Flamepelt meowed showing a picture of a kitty "isn't it cute?"

"yes… very" Firestar meowed.

"okay now the episode is done, have a good day y'all" Flamepelt purred.


	24. SPECIAL CAT NEWS EDITION

Hello and welcome back to cat news, I would like to say, I am so proud to have 100 something reviews!! WOO!!! I'd like to thank you, dear reader, I appreciate your reviews I'm so happy, so today, I will have a great chapter coming up, a special episode that is, all my ideas written in it, all scenes deleted, and check out your beloved characters dress rooms and stuff. I'm so happy you wouldn't believe! Okay enjoy this great cat news episode!

* * *

Well please review! this is the Special Edition of Cat News, you will most likely not get a episode like this again! look around part of the Cat news' GREAT studio, check out tigerstars room, and of course alot more, plus, check out all the members in the cat news crew! YOU MAY BE IN IT!

Please review, no flames if you flame tigerstar will come to your house, in a skirt which will hang low and a thong on, a very small top and he will steal your COUCH!

* * *

"hello and welcome to this 'special' fancy feast cat news episode!!!!" Sandstorm purred. "lets show you around our studio!"

"this is our beloved make out room, as you can see, its all comfy in here with pillows…" Firestar purred "Squirrelflight designed it. We are hoping to get a lock for the door, cloudtail likes making lovely videos of people in here"

"hey? What can I say? It's a great way of getting viewers!" Cloudtail purred. "anyhow I caught Tigerstar and Darkstripe and Bluestar and Skycloud in here licking each other, it was soooooooooo weird" cloudtail purred.

"uhh anyhow, let me show you my room!" Graystripe meowed as he walked into his room, which was filled with froot loops, his F.F.S member card, his guitar, chip bags on the floor, soda cans all over his desk and pictures of Silverstream he drew and Millie hiding in a basket. "yah this is my room, I keep my garbage because it makes me feel less lonely" Graystripe meowed giving Millie a lick.

"uhhh let me take you to MY room!" Tigerstar meowed, his room was tidy, his bed had blankets and pillows that said "Sexy" all over them, or even "hot" or even weirder he made his own that said "sexy hot babe who's sizzling, I'm like tastier than the song Fergalicous" then he opened his closet "these are my clothes, and this is my thong closet…yah this ones my lucky pink shiny one, this is my blue one..." Tigerstar got cut off.

"Please don't talk about it!" Firestar hissed.

"right right anyhow, im going to decorate my walls with sequins!" Tigerstar purred "and im gonna put pictures of my mates all over my pants!" Tigerstar purred.

"That's messed up right there." Firestar meowed.

"anyhow commercials stay tuned for more sexy news." Firestar meowed "well we will get to the news later."

Commercials.

Lalala

La

La

La

Ooohhh cat news!

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" sandstorm greeted.

"let me show you MY room!" Cloudtail purred "Then lets continue cat news…I've got juicy news!"

"yup and im HELPING" Spottedshadow purred.

"awesome." Cloudtail purred then whispered into Spottedshadows ear…"you're going to need to film Firestar mostly."

"hehe okay" Spottedshadow purred.

"uhh its best I introduce you to some members." Firestar said. "some of them are still in the back…drinking stuff and eating stuff." Firestar said.

"okay we have…" sandstorm paused and looked at her notes. "we have Wildfire, Cloudtails buddy, Spottedshadow, cloudtails buddy, Dragonpelt Tigerstar's buddy, Iceflight Graystripes buddy, Steelclaw Firestars buddy, Feathertail and Silvermist, working together on their own piece, and Skycloud with her own section, and of course, Smallstream silverstreams buddy!" Sandstorm purred.

"okay Silverstream, Smallstream Weather please." Firestar purred.

"Its SUNNY oh my just look out your window!" Smallstream hissed

"yah, so go eat ice-cream out in your backyard or whatever or some crazy crap like that, maybe make bacon on the top of your car!" Silverstream hissed.

"okay thanks, today recently, Leopardstar said 'the bri'ish are coming the bri'ish are coming run for your lives dear children, the bri'ish are coming!' it was odd" Iceflight meowed while Firestar, and Sandstorm, and Cloudtail started throwing Paper airplanes all around the room.

"thank you Iceflight" Firestar meowed.

"Today Firestar made out with a book cover" Wildfire purred.

"HEY! Not cool!" Firestar meowed.

"Firestar some times I think you have issues." Sandstorm hissed.

"well sometimes I think you make out with cloudtail" Firestar hissed.

"How did you know? I mean WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?" cloudtail hissed shifty uncomfortably.

"…never mind" Firestar meowed, he's always been clueless of everything going around him.

"not only that, Firestar also made out with the one, the only, Leopardstar" Spottedshadow said devilishly.

"gulp…" Firestar said "who hired these guys anyways?" Firestar hissed.

"FIRESTAR HOW DARE YOU!" Sandstorm hissed, then SMACK down goes a pot on Firestars head.

"ugh why do I feel pain…why do I feel pain…why do I feel pain…" Firestar asked.

"You're feeling what I'm feeling! HAHA!" Sandstorm hissed.

"and now commercials!" Graystripe purred.

Commercials.

La

La

La

La

Ooohhh cat news!

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Steelclaw said. "We're here live with Tigerstar and Dragonpelt for some sexy News" Steelclaw said "hey who edited my script?"

"heeeyy STOP IT BLUESTAR! I'm Tigerstar here live, with Tallstar, yet again you have another sexy problem" Tigerstar said "what is happening this time?"

"uhh The Easter Bunny didn't give me my eggs" Tallstar hissed.

"and why is this important to you?" Dragonpelt asked. "they're JUST eggs…do they means something to you that brings great importance to Windclan?"

"Yes, they make us happy when we break up with people you know? COUGH COUGH COUGH, sorry, I've got the rare disease of 'I Don't Know' its very deadly." Tallstar meowed.

"I see, Darkstripe STOP IT" Tigerstar hissed.

"to you my sexy babe Skycloud…" Tigerstar said putting on lip-gloss.

"okay, this is my section of the show where I interview someone." Skycloud meowed happily.

"uhh you have mail!" The mailman said.

"Oh its from my sexy mate…awww cute it's a love letter" Skycloud giggled reading it, it had little hearts all over it, and a picture of Skycloud in the middle that Tigerstar drew. "awww how cute I'm hanging this up." Skycloud purred.

BLUESTARS HOUSE WHICH IS ACCUALLY TIGERSTARS HOUSE BECAUSE THEY ALL LIVE TOGETHER, INCLUDING DARKSTRIPE.

"I'm so jealous why doesn't Tigerstar do ANY of that sexy stuff with ME" Bluestar hissed.

CAT NEWS

"we're going to interview Cloudtail right after these commercials." Skycloud purred.

Commercials.

La

La

La

La

Ooohhh cat news!

"welcome back, hello Cloudtail how are you?" Skycloud meowed.

"I feel PAIN" Cloudtail hissed.

"why?" Skycloud asked.

"because I cut myself DUH" Cloudtail hissed.

"and why?" Skycloud asked taking away Cloudtails knife.

"I'm Emo" Cloudtail meowed.

"I see, well to you Feathertail and Silvermist!" Skycloud purred.

"Hello! Welcome to OUR section of this show!" Feathertail purred happily.

"yes welcome, we're here in Starclan, looking at this NEW restaurant, check it out its made out of sunshine lollipops and rainbows lalalallaa….I forgot the end" Silvermist meowed.

"weird" Feathertail meowed.

"ANYHOW" Silvermist meowed "they just told me to get ready for Christmas, I don't know why."

"well to you Cloudtail" Feathertail purred.

"This just in sandstorm made out with Firestar Ooohhh snaaappp!!!!" Cloudtail meowed.

"dangit I KNEW we should have got a lock today!" Firestar hissed.

"yah" Sandstorm meowed.

"Hi sorry im late" Squirrelflight meowed. "I woke up in a trash can this morning and I didn't know where I was for the LONGEST time, until Vlad- err I mean uhh Bramby yah uhh bramby…cough cough, called me."

"weird. Anyhow, Flamepelt you have news?" Firestar asked.

"yup" Flamepelt purred all bouncy in her seat. "Today I went to the park with Graystripe and I TOTALLY saw like, Bluestar and Tigerstar and Darkstripe AND Skycloud sitting on a bench sharing a milkshake and they all had their own straws it was SO cute, until Tigerstar showed off what he bought at the mall- new Thongs." Flamepelt meowed and started sketching it out. "see?"

"ewwww" Graystripe meowed running to the nearest bathroom.

"anyhow that ends this cat news episode!" Firestar purred.

"you means this CONCLUDES this cat news episode" Graystripe purred.

"NO WAIT!" Flamepelt meowed.

"what? Sandstorm asked.

"uhhmmm, Graystripe sing your 'I'm glad I didn't grab that phone' song!" Flamepelt purred.

"FINE!" Graystripe said. "im glad I didn't pick up that phone,

Cause' man, no body was home,

So I started chilling in ma house eating froot loops,

Till I found a special loop…

Silverstream Millie Silverstream Millie,

I FOUND YOU IN THE LOOP HEHE." Graystripe purred "isn't it so romantic?"

"yah…" Silverstream and Millie purred with a dreamy sigh.

"now that Finally Concludes this Cat News Episode, see you next time!" Graystripe purred.


	25. Update on cat news plz read

Cat news NEWS REPORT THINGY please read.

Hello my reviewers I would like to announce my retirement- JUST KIDDING!

I will not be updating for awhile homework has been a drag lately. And by the way- I will not be adding all the cat news members all the time I will add them every couple chapters due to hardness this causes, when I add people to cat news I have to remember so many new names, where they work at and how they are going to act it is very very hard to do this, trust me you would find it pretty ahrd if you added like 50 reviewers to your story, im sorry if this causes sadness. Don't wory you will be in act news crew (if you signed up of course) every like I don't know…1-3 chapters. I will most likely not be updating during school days- mostly on the weekends.

-Evilkillerprincess (A.K.A Paige)

I shall not be gone foreverrrrrrrrr!!

oh by the way im also going to be goine fr awhile because im writing this story that's going to take me around a week to finally complete- its a short story and i need to condense it even more than i already did- need to change it from 1782 words to 500..yaaayy...anyhow, lik ei said i will not be gone forever, and for now heres a very wuick news report firestar made uo hit it firestar!

"Hi and welcome back to cat news!" Firestar and Sandstorm greeted warmly.

"Today im going to tell you about how much food is tasty and yummy and tasty..." Firestar got cut off by Cloudtail.

"and how sexy your wife is i assume is what you're going to say next?" Cloudtail giggled

"YES!"

well cya y'all my next chapter will probably come up NEXT WEEKEND


	26. bday special

Hey guys its almost my birthday, and id like y'all to guess how old I am turning… 'cause I wanna know how old y'all think I am. EEIII!!! So, I thought y'all could celebrate with me with this cat news b-day special…itz silverstreams b-day right now as you read this..does NOT matter what day...just…yah you should get it by now… well enjoy!

Cat news

"Hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm greeted.

"yes welcome back I have a important thing I must tell everyone!" Firestar said.

"What would that be?" Cloudtail purred inching his way to the backroom for some reason.

"I drew a kitty see?" Firestar purred.

"uhh okay well Tigerstar to you!" Graystripe purred riding his new Tonka truck he got.

"Uhmm well, we're here live with Tallstar who has and important thingy to say, Tallstar?" Tigerstar said while he quickly gave Tallstar the microphone and then he thong fell off. "oh dear let me just grab that!" Tigerstar said while he bent over so his butt was facing the camera and put on his thong.

"EWWW!!!!" the camera crew hissed.

"oh whatever you know I'm sexy." Tigersar purred.

"I'm sorry but I'm not turned on by guys dressing up as girls stuffing their bra's and wearing thongs to work…I'm sorry I'm just not." The camera crew said.

"whatever, Tallstar?" Tigerstar snapped.

"I'm sexy" Tallstar purred.

"go fudge yourself Tallstar, we all know I'm the sexy one." Tigerstar hissed.

Just suddenly, everyone started slapping each other facing the opposite direction.

"STOP I have news its Silverstreams birthday." Squirrelflight shrieked "LETS MAKE HER A SURPRISE PARTY!"

"why her? You didn't get me anything special for my birthday…" Tigerstar meowed sadly.

"you're gender confused" Squirrelflight meowed.

"what does that have to do with anything?" Tigerstar hissed. "and I am NOT I'm a guy but I want to be a girl"

"uhhmm okay…Silverstream weather!" Firestar meowed.

"the weather is…oh I know look out your window." Silverstream hissed wearing a little party hat. "do I have to wear this stupid thing?!"

"yes its your birthday you're a princess now." Sandstorm meowed.

"that's for kits! I'm 50 years old." Silverstream hissed.

" YOU SAID YOU WERE 30!!!!!!" Graystripe meowed.

"I know that's because I am…I'm just being weird." Silverstream meowed shifting uncomfortably.

"okay commercial break stay tuned!" Graystripe meowed..

Commercials…

Lah lah lah

OOOOO cat news ZOMG NO WAY!

"hi welcome back!" sandstorm purred.

"Silverstream is at Graystripes place doing STUFF and I know what that 'STUFF' is!!!" Cloudtail said with an evil grin.

"do we REALLY have to know what they do at their house?" Firestar hissed.

"yes you do, they are…" cloudtail got cut off.

"LAH LAH LAH LAH LAH" Firestar hissed plugging his ears.

"I was just about to say they're licking portraits of eachother…what else would they be doing?" Cloudtail said.

"uhhhhh I thought u were going to say…uhhmmm…eating each others fur…" Firestar said coughing.

"yah I was thinking that at first." Cloudtail purred.

at Graystripes house

"aww you got me a cake...but why does it say 'surprise' o it?" Silverstream asked Graystripe.

"I hired you a man-stripper" Graystripe said poking the cake.

"WHAT?!" Silverstream hissed.

"SURPRISE!" Tigerstar hissed.

"TIGERSTAR?!?!?!??!?!?!?" Silverstream hissed.

"what?" Tigerstar meowed.

"you're a stripper?!?!?!" Silverstream hissed.

"yup! I got it from my papa!" Tigerstar purred.

-back at cat news-

"yah yah yah yah!!!!! HELLO HELLO!!!" screamed jaypaw.

"uhmm jaypaw?" Firestar meowed.

"oh sorry guys uhh jaypaw wants to be bono…" Squirrelflight meowed walking away slowly.

-at thunderclan border between shadowclan...n thunderclan.-

"hey this is OUR turf!" Firestar hissed

"bring it!" shadowclan hissed.

-Firestar slaps everyone in shadowclan, shadowclan falls over-

"we did it everyone!" Firestar purred

-everyone form every single clan 'cept shadow walks around all together-

"I've paid my dues - Time after time - I've done my sentence But committed no crime - And bad mistakes I've made a few I've had my share of sand kicked in my face - But I've come through  
We are the champions - my friends And we'll keep on fighting - till the end - We are the champions - We are the champions No time for losers Cause we are the champions - of the world!!!!!" everyone sang happily

"WELL THAT CONCLUDES OUR CAT NEWS EPISODE CYA NEXT TIME!" Graystripe purred.

::::  
Hey guys!!!! Please guess how old im turning…my bdays on October 28th by the way. Oh yes I have interesting news to tell you. Me and my friend are thinking about making a claymation version of cat news. We havem't started we just thinking it would be so fun! So we might make it. Well I better get going I have like…2 more drawing to colour. PLZ REVIEW! No flames


	27. tigerstarluvs his thongs

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm greeted.

"yes welcome back my minions!" Firestar said all evil like.

"no one here is your onion!" Squirrelflight meowed, who was ascually early today, surprisingly.

"your early?!?!?! Wow…" Firestar said.

"yah Vlad was being too froot loopish this morning….and invited 50 cats to his house… so I got annoyed and left early." Squirrelflight meowed sadly.

"err Vlad isn't a warrior name…ARE YOU GOING OUT WITH A ROGUE?!??!?" Firestar hissed.

"No" Squirrelflight said.

"then a human?!?!" Firestar hissed angrier.

"OH SO IT TOOK YOU THIS LONG TO FIND OUT?!!?!" Squirrelflight hissed.

"YOU KNOW that you are breaking warrior code number 36548!!!" Firestar hissed bringing out a long piece of paper with 'warrior code' on the top of it.

"what ever dad! HE ACCUALLY LOVES ME NOT LIKE YOU! WAAHHH!!!" Squirrelflight cried running off.

"what the F'bleep' is up with her?" sandstorm asked.

"maybe its her time." Leafpool asked.

"what?" sandstorm said.

"you know her spazz time, everyone has it like at least once a year!" Leafpool said.

"uhh okay?" Sandstorm said.

"this just in, brambleclaw is doing stuff with Squirrelflight…like...MAKING OUT! HAHAHAHAHAH!!" cloudtail shrieked.

"OH now she's breaking warrior code number 45, You don't cheat on your mate!" Firestar hissed.

"leave me alone, I love both of my mates, just like how Tigerstar loves his 3 mates…." Squirrelflight purred.

"okay Tigerstar please make us pretend all of this isn't happening and, tell us your news from Tallstar?" Sandstorm meowed.

"well im here in Windclan with Tallstar, to ask him, what is going on?" Tigerstar.

"your supply of thongs you ordered, well hasn't arrived yet, its been a week and I'm worried." Tallstar meowed.

"MY THONGS?!?!?! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!" Tigerstar star said falling to the ground

"WHY STARCLAN WHY?!?!? Why MY thongs?!?!?!" Tigerstar meowed crying.

"that is so messed up in so many ways.." sandstorm meowed.

"yes very...well commercial time!" Graystripe purred.

Commercials.

Lalala

Lala

Lalallaa

OOOOOOO cat ne-

-some cat turns off tv.-

"hey I was watching that!" Bluestar hissed.

"well I want to watch a movie!" Darkstripe hissed.

"WELL I WANT TO WATCH CAT NEWS!!!!" Bluestar screamed slapping Darkstripe wildly.

"WELL this is MY house!!!" Darkstripe hissed.

"NO ITS MINE!!" Bluestar said throwing Darkstripe to the ground and grabbing the remote control and turns on cat news while pinning Darkstripe on the ground by sitting on him.

"WAAHHH!!!" Darkstripe screamed

"SHUT UP!" Bluestar hissed.

"anyhow, that is how important the make-out room is for us cat news people." Sandstorm meowed.

"aww see?!?! I missed the good part!" Bluestar hissed jumping on Darkstripe.

"OUCHIES!!" Darkstripe cried.

"well cat news is giving out one special offer to all you viewers!" Graystripe meowed.

"the first reviewer to say 'ima little kitty in a little kitty zoo with a lil' kitty friend and a lil' kitty lollipop with extra fries and grraaaaavy with a little funky paper hat with words that say lalala on the top and fresh baked tiny doughnuts with a pickle in the corner while my French fries sing with joy and a happy catmeal special in my hands while my friend start singing Christmas carols to all the happy people with a cucumber on her head hoping that it turns into a pickle oh what joy this is, to be with my best buddy at the zoo without any shoes and Tigerstar throwing thongs to the ground!!!' gets to pick what theme the next cat news chapter is, Tigerstar themed...which means extra Tigerstar fun, all the parts that cat news cut off of his act will actually be in the show instead of…well...being cut out...or the Bluestar and Darkstripe fights that go on in there house, every time they fight we'll put it in there for you guys to enjoy!" Graystripe meowed.

"hard choice this is." Sandstorm meowed. "both are extremely crazy…"

"pick Tigerstar because Tigerstar is sexy." Tigerstar said.

"HEY! Bad Tigerstar BAD!" Squirrelflight meowed slapping Tigerstar while Tigerstar kept screaming. Ooo I been naughty… which somehow turned on Squirrelflight who then started making out with Tigerstar…

"somehow I knew you'd love me again" Tigerstar meowed smiling, then Squirrelflight started slapping him again while every cat news crew people started puking while Tigerstar screamed, ooooo I've been REALLY bad this year! Which turned on Squirrelflight AGAIN and she started to make out with Tigerstar and Tigerstar blurted out something…

"will you marry be Squirrelflight?" Tigerstar said "we've been away from each other for years baby, lets get married again!" Tigerstar said happily

"Okay!" Squirrelflight said getting her wedding dress out. "IM GETTING MARRIED DADDY!!!"

"OOO I'm so happy for you!!!" every girl shrieked in the cat news crew giving hugs to Squirrelflight while Firestar stood there all confused. "first brambleclaw then that other dude then brambleclaw again then tigerstar then vlad then brambleclaw again and now Tigerstar?" Firestar said all confused.

"I think I've only really loved Tigerstar, now he's going to have 4 mates again!!" Squirrelflight meowed happily…

-meanwhile-

"OH I'm so happy for them!" Bluestar and Darkstripe said happily all crying. "We're going to have another room mate who's married to our mate!" they cried happily

"well that concludes this very…weird confusing episode of cat news! See you next time!" Graystripe purred.

* * *

Heyguys, you all heard graystripe, if you say that really long thing in a review first you choose from tigerstar ot bluestar and darkstripes fights. i'll write a story for both, the cat news crew isn't in any of them though, there will just be scenes from tigerstar from many different episodes that have been cut out, or just bluestar and darkstripe fighting in their house...if you dont want either of these..which is you dont that would creep me out cuz, well who wouldn't want to see them? like for all you know Tigerstar could be making out with his thong or darkstripe and bluestar having a pillow fight which ended up with them jumping out of the window and then end up being best friends in the end licking eachother untill tigerstar and squirrelfight get back from their wedding...soo chose, No flames and i haven't accually got flames for a long time im just making sure i don't get any because if i get a flame tigerstar will take over your room...and throw his thongs everywhere, maybe even on your head! muahahahaha...Please review! and yah...

Oh by the way, i have to add this, i am so sorry i haven't been on lately you guys I have just had so much things to do and some tests and homework...so weird...and everyone guess how old i turned!! i dare you, cuz if you all guess something, i am going to tell you how old i accually am in the next chapter!!


	28. cloudtail i want to murder you now

"hello and welcome back to Cat news!!!" Firestar greeted

"our winner for the long sentence thingy which we haven't named isssssss…."sandstorm said trying to open an envelope. "Catland creator!! You get to uhhmmm….choose umm lets see here I hate this I keep losing my papers everywhere…" Sandstorm said shuffling around in her desk. "ahh here we goooo!! You get to choose if you want more Tigerstar fun or Bluestar and Darkstripe fighting each other."

"yahh that sounds fun!!!" Graystripe meowed jumping up and down and up and down and up…and down…and up…and down…then up the stairs then down the stairs then up the stairs then down the stairs until Squirrelflight walked in.

"hey guuuyyyysssss!!! Here's my wedding invitations! Me and Tigerstar can't wait!" Squirrelflight purred.

"why marry him? He's gender confused." Silverstream said, kind of upset she missed yesterdays weather report.

"I LOVE him!!" Squirrelflight purred.

"whatever uhhmm Tigerstar what's your news from Windclan today?" Graystripe purred licking a giant lollipop.

"hello Tallstar we here you have good news today finally?" Tigerstar asked happily.

"yah!! And bad news…what do you want to here first?" Tallstar asked.

"bad news." Tigerstar purred.

"Okay a 6 foot tall man eating chicken is annoying us, this stupid man eating chicken is eating all out chickens its terrible!" Tallstar said sadly.

"I see now the good news?" Tigerstar said.

"yah your thongs came in." Tallstar meowed.

"praise Starclan! My thongs!!! My precious baby thongs!!" Tigerstar meowed grabbing a box full of thongs looking through them all.

Tallstar smiled happily watching Tigerstar like he was a kit.

"well that was rather odd" Firestar said.

"yes, uhmm Firestar can you come to my room please?" Sandstorm meowed smiling.

"okay!!!" Firestar meowed.

"ooo this seems juicy…." Cloudtail purred creeping up behind them.

"uhh Silverstream weather?" Graystripe purred.

"It is raining you silly biscuits!!! Can't you look out your window?! Like seriously! Get off your couch NOW and look out your window. It could be sunny, it could be rainy, it could be snowy, it could be raining doughnuts. Now look out your window and you will find out you lazy little muffins…: Silverstream hissed.

"for the past 5 days of being on cat news I have gathered up the tastiest information, this will be the best episode for me." Cloudtail said devilishly while Firestar and sandstorm were tied up in the back of the room not wanting cloudtail to say all this information.

"oh lets hear!" Squirrelflight meowed happily.

"okay here we go! One, Firestar started going out with spotted leaf again OOOO!!!" cloudtail purred.

"FIRESTAR HOW DARE YOU!! I'd smack you but I'm all tied up!!! Ohh but when we get out of here….." Sandstorm hissed.

"then sandstorm ohh you naughty girl you made out with old Tallstar? That doesn't seem at all like you." Cloudtail smiled.

"uhh sandstorm? Why Tallstar? He's 806 years old…" Firestar meowed while sandstorm was shaking her head slowly at cloudtail.

"then oh this one is juicy, When Firestar and sandstorm walked into their office, they" Cloudtail had to stop himself so he could giggle a bit. "they did each others nails!" Cloudtail giggled.

"false information!" Firestar hissed, unfortunately he un-sheathed his claws and everyone saw his glittery pink claws sandstorm did.

"nice try buddy, okay this is the last, most JUICY thing I found!" cloudtail meowed while Firestar wished he wasn't there.

"okay Firestar stayed with spottedleaf last night while sandstorm thought Firestar had to work late, Firestar had dinner with spottedleaf and made out a few times, they went to sleep, while Firestar laid at the edge of her bed and then had a pillow fight because they got bored and giggled wildly and then they visited a zoo and did stuff there that I couldn't make out…and yah!" Cloudtail purred.

"I hate you Firestar!" Sandstorm hissed

"WELL YOU made out with Tallstar!" Firestar hissed

"well you did stuff with spottedleaf!" Sandstorm screamed.

"Well you did stuff with Tallstar!" Firestar hissed.

"no I didn't!" sandstorm screamed.

"oh girls! Calm down!" cloudtail giggled knowing that would make Firestar angry.

Firestar started twitching wildly.

"oops…" cloudtail said backing away slowly.

"RAWR!" Firestar hissed attempting to murder cloudtail.

"commercials please." Graystripe meowed calmly.

Commercials

Lalalalalaallaa

Lallalal

Allala

Lalalla

Llalalal

OOOO cat news!!!!

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm greeted warmly.

"yes welcome back, we're here today to witness Squirrelflight and Tigerstars wedding!" Firestar purred.

"oo here's the briiiiiiiiiiiidee eeeiiiiiiiii my little girls getting married! Shes getting married!! MARRIIIIEEEEEEEDDDDDDD!!!!!!" Sandstorm screamed joyfully jumping up and down holding on to Squirrelflight.

"uhh mom?" Squirrelflight meowed attempting to walk down the aisle. Surprisingly Tigerstar was wearing a suit, not the wedding dress he wore to all his other weddings.

Blah blah blah stuff happens.

"You may now kiss the bride." Firestar purred, and the kiss turned into Tigerstar making out with Squirrelflight all the way to their limousine.

"well this concludes this episode of cat news!! See you next time!" Graystripe purred.

* * *

Hey! i hope you enjoyed this episode of cat news! silly cloudtail ratting out cloudtail..when will he ever stop? well maybe next episode, oir maybe the episode acfter that, i dont know yet, catland creator gets to choose what the nex chapter is between the two choices, you heard sandstorm. remember no flames or tigerstar will come in your room and throw thongs everywhere...!! anywho!! please reveiw. and your next chapter should be coming up soon...

-EVIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLkillerprincess


	29. sexytigerstar

Warning: the following program says the following words many times: Sexy, thong, and babe. also some scenes may be...a tiny bit T rated but hay, some episisodes of cat news are kinda t rated anyways. also, may contain scenes that yo umay want to close your eyes, infact you shoudl close your eyes the whole time while you're reading this. tigerstar is weird. he luves his thongs and LLLLUUUVVS the word sexy. YOU ARE WARNED! atleast you should be.

Tigerstars sexy shenanigans

A story by prandka/pag pag/paige/paigey/paigee/1st princess/evilkillerprincess (oh by the way my real name is Paige just incase I may confuse you all with the names)

"hello welcome back to cat news! Which I'm changing to super sexy cat news for today!!" Tigerstar purred. "I'm so sexy oh so sexy…" Tigerstar sang shoving his microphone in his pants. "lets roll!!!"

Everyone from the cat news crew starts following Tigerstar, sadly of course, they really did not want this episode to be based on him, but of course the writer, Paige, and a wonderful reviewer wanted to have it this way. So ha! Anyhow, Tigerstar then led everyone to a magical land… Okay no seriously this isn't how this goes. Here is how it REALLY goes.

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm greeted.

"today no weather report or cloudtail ratting people out. We're here to show you all the clips of tigey, that YOU LOOOOOOOVE that actually got cut out due to the cat news camera crew kind of…well...vomited many times. Well here you go!" Firestar purred.

Things cut out from episode 15.

"okay to you Tigerstar!" Firestar said happily, this was the 5th time they tried making this scene work out.

"We're here live with Tallstar, and my sexy lover Bluestar…she's hot…" Tigerstar purred whispering something in bluestars ear.

"uhh okay hi…"

-tigerstar scratches his butt while everyone tries to ignore his un-sexiness.-

"so, what bad news to you have THIS time?" Tigerstar said annoyed while adjusting his thong, but obviously annoyed by having to go to Windclan for every single one of his news reports.

"well-" Tallstar got cut off.

"is it just me or is REALLY hot outside?" tigerstar said taking off his top…which sadly made everyone giggle because he was wearing a stuffed bra.

"no no its very hot…" Shadowheart giggled trying to zoom in on some hot guy in the distance.

"okay well continue Tallstar." Tigerstar meowed, happily…not at all embarrassed.

"okay well you see we've been having-" Tallstar got cut off again

"its very hot outside just wait a second please." Tigerstar said taking off his skirt...which then showed his thong.

"please put your pants on babe!" Bluestar meowed

-screen gets all blurry-

"oh silly tigerstar! Why must he be so disturbing?" Cloudtail giggled.

"okay here check this one out!" Firestar purred

Chapter 16: things that have been cut out of the show.

"okay hit it tigerstar!" sandstorm purred.

"okay babe, I had fun last night with you yah know…" Tigerstar purred being all sexy.

"heh…tigey, cutie, my husbands here…" Sandstorm purred putting earmuffs on Firestars head.

"but baaaaaabe I LOOOOOOVE you" Tigerstar meowed.

"I'm breaking up with you your weird." Sandstorm said making out with firestar. "plus I've been cheating on you!"

"waaahh okay whatever, oh wait be right back people I need my lucky thong…" Tigerstar purred.

"uhh what?!" Tallstar hissed while tigerstar took off his old thong, threw it on Tallstar, then put on his other thong which was in his purse.

"much better." Tigerstar purred.

"EEEWWW!!!" Tallstar meowed.

"oh don't worry its only been unwashed for about 20 minutes it will be fine." Tigerstar purred.

"uhhmmm?" Tallstar meowed.

"I change thongs every 20 minutes!" Tigerstar purred.

"okay whatever, well my news is that Windclan has been having massive flying fish shortages, the fish are no longer flying above our clan and are running out of prey!" Tallstar hissed. "I BLAME SHADOWCLAN!"

"don't blame good ol' sexy shadowclan babe" Tigerstar meowed.

"uhh I'm a guy…" Tallstar meowed.

"well i like guys and girls and I dress up like a girl, that work for you hun?" Tigerstar purred.

"…you take 50 dollars?" Tallstar whispered.

"yah sure" Tigerstar purred.

-cat news people start to vomit-

COMMERCIALS

lalallalalal OOO cat news!

"oh man that day was awkward." Firestar meowed "we'll do one more scene then we'll be out of here kitties!"

Chapter 17: the REAL interview!

"hi tigerstar, you sexy woman!!" Tigerstar purred.

"ooohh tigerstar you're the sexiest guy ever!" Tigerstar meowed

"we would make sexy kits." Tigerstar purred.

"yes very!" Tigerstar meowed.

"I heard babies are made from trees." Tigerstar purred.

"no they're not they're from Toronto you idiot!" Tigerstar hissed while getting in a fight with himself.

"oh lets never fight again!" Tigerstar meowed holding a mirror up to his face.

"okay babe!" Tigerstar said, just then he started making out with the mirror, it was awkward.

The end.

* * *

Lol XD no flames...or tigerstar will steal ur couch, yup he will im serious!!! well i better go cya people...please review and tell me- dont you think these were like the best tigerstar scenes? probably. or maybe not..or maybe they are..or not..yes..no YES NNOOOOO YES NUUUUUU YEEEEESSSSSSs- wait wait wait...what was i tallking about? okay lol just review..im hyper so i better stop typing... 


	30. firestarLUUUUUVV

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm greeted warmly.

"yes welcome back!" Firestar purred.

"this just in cloudtail made out with sandstorm OO!!" Cloudtail giggled. "oh wait did I just rat myself out? AHHH!!!" Cloudtail screamed while Firestar chased him furiously.

"sandstorm Ma ho!" Firestar screamed.

"I'm no ho!" Sandstorm hissed trying to smack Firestar.

"uhh Tigerstar? Lets hear your news report." Graystripe purred.

"well I'm here live with Tallstar, Tallstar what's your sad, sad news?" Tigerstar asked

"everyone here is sooo F'bleep'ing tired." Tallstar hissed.

"I see, HIT IT SILVERSTREAM!" Tigerstar purred.

"I'm not telling y'all the weather today!" Silverstream hissed.

"why?!" Firestar screamed.

"Uhhmm?!?!? Haven't you paid attention to me for the past 2 years of being on cat news?! You are ALL couch potatoes, you cant up to look outside to see the weather. Its COLD okay?!?! Wet and COLD!" Silverstream hissed.

"I see." Firestar hissed.

"this just in sandstorm made out with me again! Hehe" Cloudtail purred "wait, what?"

"SANDSTORM!" Firestar hissed.

"what he knows how to make me happy…" Sandstorm meowed

"F'bleep' YOU!" Firestar hissed storming off.

"…spazz" sandstorm hissed.

"hey guys sorry I'm late!" Squirrelflight purred.

"why are you late this time?" Sandstorm asked calmly.

"well first I had to…" Squirrelflight said

SOMEONES HOUSE

"oh I better cover your ears Darkstripe hunny" Tigerstar meowed covering darkstripes ears.

"…and yah that's why" Squirrelflight said.

"that's the most disturbing thing I have EVER heard" Sandstorm meowed puking.

"yah well, you know, Tigerstars my husband and I love him." Squirrelflight purred.

"this just in firestar made out with spottedleaf." Cloudtail giggled.

"firestar how could you?" sandstorm hissed

"well you made out with Cloudtail!"

"well your with spottedleaf!"

"well you made out with Tallstar!"

"well you made out with princess!"

"You promised you'd keep that a secret I didn't know she was my sister!"

"well you're making me angry!"

"well you had kits with brambleclaw!"

"you said you'd keep that a secret!"

"stop it!" Spottedleaf purred. "Firestar has good news…for ALL of us!"

"I'm having kits!" Firestar purred "with spottedleaf!"

"OH GREAT!" Sandstorm hissed walking away

"Oh no they're coming!" Firestar said puking out a kitten.

"what the?" Sandstorm hissed.

"oh my kit! My precious baby kit!" Firestar purred

To be continued

* * *

Srry ive been gone...One of my friends was being all like...evil...and like ive had homework...so YAAHH EWnjoy no flames or tigerstar will eta a thong infront yof you and TRUST me you would NOT want to see that! 


	31. Firestarluv2

Hey you guyyyysss! my chapters are getting really short if you haven't noticed...Im running out of ideas, if you have any funky fresh ideas for cat news...please say them...and i think im gonna make a cat news special edition it may answerr any questions on why bluestar isn't on screen much anymore if u haven't noticed. as well as every other of tigerstars lovers...also a few interviews from a few characters. So just sit tight it'll come soon! Please, read and review! NO FLAAMMES cuz they are evil...!!

* * *

Cat news!!!

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm hissed while firestar tried to get sandstorm to feed his kit.

"Eat my kitty eat!" Firestar purred.

"NUU!!!" sandstorm hissed smacking firestar.

"but sandstorm!!" Firestar cried.

"Ask yellowfang!" Sandstorm hissed furiously

"Nuuuuu!! Yellowfang is a B'bleep' and would eat my baby kitty!" Firestar cried dramatically.

"Ugh ask spottedleaf your Lover!" Sandstorm hissed.

"fine you meany pants!" Firestar hissed storming away.

"tigerstar? Your news report?" Sandstorm said calming "in…out…" she said biting her lip.

"uhhmm we're here live with Tallstar!" Tigerstar purred. "Tallstar what do you have to say this time?"

"well you see…its my birthday today…and theres this huge fight between if we should watch a movie or shove pencils in your pants." Tallstar said sadly

"oh oh oh! I know!! Shove pencils down my pants!" Tigerstar purred happily jumping up and down.

"ohh tigerstar save that for me!" Squirrelflight giggled sticking a pencil down his pants.

"ooo hunny that felt funny!" Tigerstar giggled making out with Tallstar.

"W T F B!" Tallstar hissed.

"what does THAT mean?" Squirrelflight said confused.

"what the fudge buckets." Tallstar sighed.

"Okay well hit it cloudtail!" Tigerstar purred.

"this just in, Firestar made out with spottedleaf, slapped her, then stormed to see sandstorm and then made out with her." Cloudtail purred proudly.

"False information!" Firestar, sandstorm and spottedleaf hissed while sandstorm and spottedleaf had a cat fight- literally.

"MEOOOOWW!!" Sandstorm hissed scratching spottedleaf.

"commercials please." Graystripe said calmly "GIRLS hug and make everything better!"

Commercials.

Lalala

Lalallala

Lalala

Ooh cat news!

"welcome back" sandstorm meowed while firestar attempted to pour ice on her. "Don't even think about it."

"fine party pooper" Firestar hissed throwing the ice on tigerstar.

"OOO I'm so cold and slippery now!" Tigerstar purred sliding along the floor

"gross." Graystripe hissed puking. "Silverstream hit it!"

"its sunny." Silverstream hissed spazzing out.

"well I guess that concludes this episode" Graystripe meowed.


	32. CATNEWS! new chappie!

Hello Guys- I have some news that may interest you after you read cat news. A little bit about if i'm staying, and what happens if i leave again? Please read if interested. Thank you.

* * *

Cat news: May this be our last chapter?

"hello and welcome back to another great episode of cat news!" Sandstrom greeted

"Well, as you know we've been away" firestar meowed

"for a VERY long time!" Cloudtail continued

"but we all atleast pitched in and wrote another episode for y'all!" Graystripe cheered

"If all goes well, we'll be back in style again!" Silverstream purred wearing her new sparkley blue dress- to catch Graystripes attention again.

Graystripe grabbed out his phone and started to text Millie.

"HAY guysh Millie shaysh she lovesh you all" Graystripe purred.

"Graystripe are you saying S's like sh's again??" Silverstream gasped.

"Don't worry its just a phase he'll get over it" Firestar said with a small loving sigh looking at a picture of spottedleaf.

"FIRESTAR! I told you to get rid of that picture A MONTH AGO!" Sandstorm hissed with rage.

"Oh you just have your panties in a knot you'll get over it." Firestar gasped, sandstorms relationship with firestar had been getting quite annoying ever since the show started to slowly go off air.

"YOU GUYS! This is supposed to be news REMEMBER?" The camera dude hissed. "we're supposed to give out important information about stuff like the A.C.S.D.L.A.B.I.T.H !! (all clans shall discuss long and boring issues they have)"

"Well I'm SOR-RY but we're just having fun cute stuff, hey maybe later tonight I can show you my Pokeballs" Tigerstar winked pulling out a red and white pokeball from his purse.

"Tigerstar WTF?" The camera person gasped.

"what doesh WTF mean??" Graystripe asked quietly.

"It means What the-" Cloudtail got cut off.

"It means what the fudge!" Silverstream said glaring at cloudtail.

"oh okay cool." Graystripe meowed going back to texting Millie.

"Gaspnesss! Anyhow tigerstar any fun news?" Firestar said staring at tigerstar.

"huh what??" Tigerstar gasped pulling his hands out of his pants.

Everyone looked at him oddly.

"I lost my cheese." Tigerstar sighed. "OH FOUND IT!" tigerstar purred pulling a block of cheese out of his thong.

"aw that's nasty! Please tell me your not going to eat that!" Sandstorm hissed.

Just then tigerstar shoved his cheese into his mouth. "mm cheddar…"

Soon everyone watching started puking into cloudtails favorite garbage bin. Except cloudtail, who was busy cutting himself in the corner.

"Uhmm Silverstream- Weather please?" Firestar gasped waiting for tigerstar to leave the room.

"Oh right yaw its cloudy and all 5 m 1 l 3 y f 4 c 3 so yah it might rain I guess you lazy couch potatoes… its called a window…" Silverstream meowed exhausted, she just gave Graystripe a piggy back ride all throughout the cat news studio.

"well that's all for now, We'll be right back after these commercials." Sandstorm purred while Cloudtail zoomed throughout the room screaming "VROOM" with his new tonka truck.

Commercials…

Lalalal

Lalala

Lalala

Oooh cat news!

"I've just seen a face I can't forget the time or place- Oh wait hi!" Sandstorm purred turning off her ipod. "Sorry uhmmm… I was uhh… listening to stuff, OMG IM SO embarrassing!!" Sandstorm said screaming out the window. She thought her voice was terrible, even though she sounded kind of like a Disney princess voice actor.

"Anyway tigerstar any news from Windclan?" Firestar asked politely. He made a bet with sandstorm to see if firestar could stand being polite to tigerstar for 5 minutes.

"OMG! Firestar you are SO racist, Like whats your problem?? You think windclanians suck omg your such a bad news reporter!" Tigerstar hissed.

Firestar stood at his desk with anger in his eyes, he loved Windclan- and was not racist at all what-so-ever.

"Like whats your problem!?" Tigerstar screamed.

"NOTHING! Okay?! Your just a crazy gender confused male cat WHOS DEAD! That's right YOUR DEAD! I know you cant admit it but YOUR DEAD, and also Drop dead ugly!!" Firestar hissed.

Tigerstar gasped with love in his eyes. "So you do pay attention to my new hair do! I spent all morning trying to look sexy for you, I knew you'd love it! And I know I'm sorry I cheated on you cute stuff, but I know you know im not dead, its okay I forgive you darling." Tigerstar said in the most girly voice imaginable.

Firestar looked at tigerstar for 5 secounds and gave up. "Aww I forgive you!" he purred.

"So, my house or yours?" Tigerstar said, winking slyly at Firestar.

Firestar looked at tigerstar all confused.

"You know, to show you my pokeballs." Tigerstar purred showing firestar one of his pokeballs he had in his purse.

"Uhm okay." Firestar gasped "your house."

"good choice." Tigerstar purred with joy. "Anyhow! Tallstar any news from Windclan?"

"Oh yes! Yes yes yes! We're a happy healthy and no problem clan now! Isn't that great?" Tallstar purred.

Tigerstar paused, he knew, this was the end for him! No more news! No more anything! What was he going to do? Just then, tigerstar punched Tallstar in the face. "How about now?"

"DID YOU JUST PUNCH ME??" Tallstar hissed.

"No it was the rabbits." Tigerstar said hiding behind his microphone.

Tallstar quickly grabbed his phone out. "Heyyyy Windclan my sexy clan, uhmm, HIDE FROM THE RABBITS! THEY'RE ATTACKING AGAIN!" Tallstar said, he was a bit slow now that he was- well dead and REALLY old.

Tigerstar smiled happily while a horse rode on his back and walked into the sunset.

"Okay that was just weird." Sandstorm gasped.

"This just in, Graystripe just ate 4 month old KFC" Cloudtail smiled. "Firestar is at spottedleafs house, and silverstream is trying to show Graystripe her watermelons." Cloudtail purred.

"uhmm…" The camera person said confused…

"Oh you know, watermelons, you know you eat them." Cloudtail meowed.

"No I was talking about the KFC thing, we had KFC 3 and a half years ago. I don't think you guys have thrown it out yet…" The camera person sighed.

"Oh yah welll Graystripes eating it." Cloudtail blushed.

"Your messed up cloudtail" Everyone meowed throwing potatoes at cloudtails head- ignoring everything he had just said.

"well that concludes this episode, we all wanted to have a pillow fight after the show so yah you guys can just go now. We'll see you soon (hopefully)." Graystripe purred.

* * *

Some news of my own to share with you guys.

The end, For now?

We'll see soon you guys, I'd just like to add, I miss cat news, its such a fun thing to write, I remember when I started it, it was a little bit shorter and maybe a bit more action packed- but idk that's just my opinion. Please don't get mad at me for any spelling errors there may be, im really lazy at the moment, and I just got back to fanfiction. I kinda lost half the stuff to do on my computer- So I might accually stay this time!! No joke, I might stay!

Okay so here's something fun for all of you who read and love cat news to do- Its to write a small story for me: about what happens when firestar goes to tigerstars house to see tigerstars pokeballs. What will happen there? Seriously I want to know. Must be atleast 3 sentences, and maximum is 7. Short and simple peoples, we all know what can happen in a short time period with tigerstar right? I mean he is going out with Bluestar and Darkstripe, and a few others but I cant remember its been awhile.

Now here is some more fun news for you guys. If I do happen to quit again, It would be such a Joy to have someone The continue on The cat news spirit, Preferably someone who knows about the cat news crew's attitudes, I wouldn't want tigerstar getting all evil again, or cloudtail to un-emo himself. It erases a little bit of style in cat news. So listen up- If you are interested in continuing cat news (if I leave and inform you all) Just give me a comment, and a short reason why you think you can spread on cat news Joy. I'll hopefully permanently stay- but no promises. I might just submit on weekends- who knows? I sure don't.

Well thank you for your time, no flames, no spelling corrections or anything. Just the fun comments please and thank you? Oh and if you have anything you would like to say about tigerstar- do tell me, I'd love to add more personality to Tigerstar. Thank you.


	33. Flamers suck chapter, have fun lovers

Cat news

Now before I continue I'd like to note something a reviewer did.

I was happily sitting at my computer desk smiling all excited of my return to read Any cat news reviews, so I opened my email, the art site I went to and of course I open my email to wake up to 6 new reviews, of course I was happy its been a long time since I received a review- so I open then up and I hear this:

THE CATS DON'T HAVE HANDS RETARD! THEY CANT EVEN WEAR CLOTHES! SQUIRRELFLIGHT IS SUCH A HOOKER!

Of course there were 2 more but that was the worst of them.. other than when she or he ripped on tigerstars thongs! I mean seriously, why read something you find idiotic? Of course I replied back a flame of my own that was dramatically about 2 paragraphs long- its not fun reading flames when you get back after about a year. And now a chapter dedicated to flamers- when your flames turn into a lovely new story idea.

Now I'd like to mention to you all before you even dare continue if you hate the GD story don't read the GD story. Thank you. We will now return to cat news.

* * *

"welcome back to cat news!" Firestar purred with anger in his eyes, he saw his reviews he saw what she said and he knew Tigerstar was doing something with his tail.

"yes welcome back" Squirrelflight meowed quietly crying in her little corner.

"whats wrong cute stuff?" Tigerstar asked quietly

"the reviewer…" Squirrelflight paused doing the most dramatic pose you can ever possibally imagine "Called me a hooker!" Squirrelflight cried and cried and cried until she bursted out saying "And was hatin' tigerstars thongs!"

"Noooooooo!!" Tigerstar screamed dramatically falling to the ground. "WWHHYYY??" Tigerstar cried, whimpering into his little box he found the other day.

"Yah I heard there was a real nasty reviewer who the writer decided to rub in his or hers nose." Sandstorm sighed.

"Yeaahh and its fun no? I mean seriously who continues reading after they already hated it? I mean LOL!" Cloudtail said.

"OMG did you just say lol?" Firestar giggled.

"oh shut up" cloudtail hissed.

"THIS JUST IN! cloudtail just said lol! He loled!" Firestar laughed and so did everyone else- except tigerstar who was still crying in the corner.

"Oh yes. Flamers really do add a little but more zest to these stories don't they? They're just asking for something fun" Sandstorm purred fixing Firestars tie.

"Thanks babes" firestar purred.

"Oh no problem, and they say cats cant wear clothes pshh… dogs wear clothes all the time." Sandstorm smiled hugging firestar.

"Mmmm spottedleaf…" Firestar purred.

"what?" Spottedleaf asked walking in randomly.

"will you have mah babies?" Graystripe meowed.

"What me?!" Spottedleaf gasped.

"OH sorry I was supposed to text millie that omg so sorry." Graystripe blushed.

"okay then." Sandstorm sighed while firestar handed spottedleaf a lollipop.

"hey! Hey! Tigerstar listen! Hey! Listen tigerstar! Hey! Hey !! hey! Listen! Listen tigerstar! Hey!" some weird fairy said following tigerstar.

"SHUT UP!" Tigerstar hissed.

"uhm what is THAT?" Firestar gasped.

"I don't know, I was playing some Zelda game or whatever, and this fairy dude was all like HEY! Listen! Hey! Link! Listen link! Heyy! Hey! Listen! Right? So anyways I was like omg shut up and ythen it got mad at me and popped out oof the TV and is not following me now. Fun no?" Tigerstar gasped.

"Oh yah totally" Firestar purred.

"weather please" Silverstream meowed.

"WEATHER? Are you kidding me? Look out your window! Omg its like right beside you! LOOK OUT YOUR WINDOW AND THERE IS THE WEATHER!" Silverstream hissed replying to herself.

Everyone stared at her awkwardly.

"what?" Silverstream asked eating a muffin. "I love muffins."

"I know you do" Graystripe purred inching his way over to silverstream- to grab her muffin of course.

"I love you guys." Tigerstar meowed making out with Tallstar.

"Ewwww!!" Firestar hissed. "Oh while your there- any news from Windclan?"

"oh yes babes Tallstar IS HAVING MY KITS!" Tigerstar purred jumping up and down.

"what?" Firestar gasped.

"yah he took the test and es going to have them tomorrow." Tigerstar purred.

"yah we just don't want to keep it a secret anymore you know?" Tallstar meowed happily.

"THAT MAKES NO SENSE! Your both male!" Cloudtail hissed dramatically.

Just that second, some random dude flew into the room and said… "I LIKE CRAYONS!"

Everyone paused.

Pause.

Paused everyone.

"Okay! Uhm! Yah! Uhm! We should go now, thanks for watching, special thanks to the flamer for the first few ideas I love watching my cat news crew dramatically do something over practically nothing! So thank you! You filled my heart with love and joy and all." Graystripe purred reading from my Q cards.

"Graystripe…" I said sadly.

"Im sorry…can we have ice scream now?" Graystripe meowed

"yes graystripe, we can."

* * *

We'll see you soon.

Oh yes and thank flamers for making me angry this morning. Sorry if the story sucks today! Have fun!!

Flame free zone: Flame and Graystripe will drop his ice cream and cry. And so will brambleclaw and tigerstar and firestar and cluestar and Tallstar- and well EVERYONE.

Love you guys you're all my best friend unless you is flaming me


	34. Cat news confessions!

Cat news

"Hello and welcome back to cat news, today I would love to announce that we're actually giving out news today, wow!" Sandstorm purred.

"This just in, Firestar was all like OH SPOTTEDLEAF in his bedroom, because she was like giving him sandwiches and stuff it was so funny when I walked into the room!" Cloudtail laughed.

"Yah and you totally said lol when you saw us" Firestar smiled.

"Hey! I use MSN a lot okay??" Cloudtail hissed.

"Yah whatever. Silverstream weather please?" Firestar meowed while sandstorm quickly snuck up behind him and smacked him with the worlds biggest dictionary.

"Lets make it a fill in the blanks game it is blank all you have to do is look out the window and you can see that it is very blank. Figure it out!!" Silverstream hissed with rage.

"Whoa –this part has been censored due to the younglings-" Firestar giggled.

"Uhh?? NO ONE!" Silverstream gasped.

"You so turn me on Silverstream" Graystripe meowed happily.

"What about Millie?" Silverstream purred slowly inching towards Graystripe.

"Oh yeah she's hot sorry." Graystripe meowed going back to texting his dearest Millie, while Silverstream left the studio.

"Okay we'll be back after these commercials." Sandstorm purred.

Commercials.

Lalala

Lalala

Lalala

Lalala

Ooohhh cat news!

"Welcome back!" Graystripe purred.

"Yes now with tigerstar with news hopefully." Sandstorm gasped looking through all her papers.

"Yes I have a good one. So today is International Thong Day, ITD, it is a very important day for all, I'm here in Windclan where everyone is celebrating putting out all their favourite thongs on the bushes trees and rocks and such, its really good for Windclan though, its keeping Riverclan away." Tigerstar purred.

"Oh really?" Firestar said surprised.

"Yah the riverclanians are all like 'zawmawgawd lyk zawmawgawd our clan is SO much prettier I mean zawmahgawd so ttly unfashionable lyk zawmawgawd tomorrow we are SO bringing in a fashion team like YEAH!' its so nice. Maybe I'll get a sexy new make-over" Tigerstar purred.

"Well okay fun. Now Squirrelflight, I believe you have something to say in shadowclan?" Sandstorm asked surprised.

"Oh yes. Shadowclan ran out of Teddy bears, so Riverclan and thunderclan have been gathering up some old teddy bears no one wants anymore and are all pitching in to hand every kit, elder, queen, and cat in shadowclan get a new teddy bear!" Squirrelflight purred.

"Well now isn't that nice?" Firestar purred. "Our little girl is a humanitarian!"

"No" Squirrelflight hissed pulling out a knife "I PLAN TO KILL THEM ALL AFTER! They stole my lollipop"

"ouchies that gave me a head ache" Tigerstar gasped.

"Oh I'm sorry tigerstar" Squirrelflight gasped.

"Cheddar" Tigerstar purred pulling cheddar out of his pants and eating it yet again.

Awkward silence.

"okay I have found my important news." Sandstorm meowed.

Everyone stared at sandstorm oddly.

"what is news?" Everyone asked.

"you guys are STUPID! Now, uhh I like celebrities that's the important news. Thank you for listening" Sandstorm meowed.

"I like Firestar!" Tigerstar cried.

"I'm cheating on sandstorm!" Firestar sighed.

"I'm Emo because of Cinderpelt!" Cloudtail meowed.

"I'm turning into a retarded Yellowfang because of Cloudtail!" Cinderpelt cried.

"I'm a bchti!" Yellowfang gasped.

"Whoa! Confession hour much?" Graystripe gasped. "WELL COUNT ME IN! I stole Firestars strawberry tie!!"

"I stole Graystripes STRIPE!" Firestar cried.

Soon everyone confessed something, and were all crying dramatically- except the camera crew, who were just embarrassed, everyone on cat news was a complete Idiot half the time, and this just proved it.

Commercials…

Lalala

Lalala

Lalala

"Sorry! We're back, and not whiney!" Sandstorm purred.

Firestar gasped "Yes. Not whiney at all. Hey Graystripe nice tie."

"thanks its yours." Graystripe purred shoving a strawberry into his mouth.

"well that ends this cat news episode" Sandstorm purred.

"concludes" Graystripe hissed.

"right! Cwancwudes." Sandstorm meowed happily.

"NO! con-cludes" Graystipe hissed.

"Con cwudes?" Sandstorm asked.

"Concludes."

"oh concludes, right yah this concludes our cat news episode" Sandstorm gasped.

"yesh, it concludes it thanks for watching" Graystripe purred.

* * *

Hello You guys! i think i might be back this time for sure, I dont know, i'm having so much fun writing cat news. Heres something fun to do for all you cat news fans, Create Tigerstar a Twin SISTER! give me her personality and name, You'll be rewarded with her being on a cat news episode, and your own cat news character will guest star in a interview performed by tigerstar himself- And if not tigerstar then choose anyone in the cat news crew- Even one of the camera crew! I will choose my favourite tigerstars sister thingy as a winner, and if you happen to be the only one who entered well then- Congradulations. I'll probably submit my next chapter next weekend. So Sit tight everyone!

Please enjoy!!

NO FLAMES DX but please review!


	35. INterview

Cat news Interview

Cat news Interview.

"Welcome back to cat news said firestar." Firestar said, narrating himself for some odd reason.

"hey I'm the greeter? Hello?" Sandstorm hissed.

"My wife hissed at me, with complete rage ranting on about something about popcorn or whatever, I always found my wife a spazz, I love her but she can never be better than spottedleaf." Firestar meowed.

"FIRESTAR!! How could you dare say such a thing??" Sandstorm hissed running off.

"well good that got rid of her, continue please." Firestar meowed.

"Yeah hi Whatever, my dads like so totally sick so like yah! Hey! Can you help me paint my nails? Like oh my god their like totally chipped." Ebonyfur meowed.

"ZOMG! Nothing I would love BETTER!" Graystripe meowed hugging ebonyfur. "We can be GIRLFRIEDS!"

"Im sorry you're a male cat?" Ebonyfur asked quietly ignoring cloudtail drooling over the gothness of ebonyfur.

"Yeah but you know I'm just cool like dat" Graystripe meowed winking to all his fangirls, Who gasped with excitements and fainted.

"I see well here you go!" Ebonyfur meowed happily while Graystripe started painting her nails.

"OMG! We should totally have a sleepover!" Graystripe purred.

"OMG! Totally! I love you Graystripe" Ebonyfur meowed.

Awkward stare.

"In the friendship ways silly!" Ebonyfur giggled while Graystripe started painting her other paws nails.

"Now anyhow Silverstream? Help?" Sandstorm gasped.

"OH YUS! Yah look out your window itz cloudy but its sunny and OMG TIGERSTAR GET OUT OF MY LUCKY CHARMS!" Silverstream growled having a total catfight with tigerstar, Tigerstar remembering how evil he is, pulled out a knife- everyone paused.

"THEY ARE MINE NOW!" Tigerstar hissed.

"okay okay okay! Did you wear your thong backwards again Tigey?" slverstream asked.

"I'm not wearing one today…" Tigerstar paused "I'm wearing…."

Everyone paused waiting for a Just kidding!

"Boxers." Tigerstar said.

Soon everyone on the cat news stag paused, terrified, it was coming to them tigerstar was going back to his normal evilness, his dark attitude, he was going to take over something-or maybe h did with the lucky charms, but tigerstar- he was something different- he could do ANYTHING.

"get your thong on we're leaving" Firestar hissed dragging tigerstar outside.

"Hey guys do you have like any like..you know… Chips here?" Graystripe and Ebonyfur asked quietly.

"oh yah I bought some for you- why don't you too lovely ladies go have fun okay?" Squirrelflight purred handing Graystripe and Ebonyfur bags of chips popcorn and marshymallows.

"thank you mommy!" They purred being purely weird girly and creepy…

"well Sandstorm you had an interview?" Squirrelflight purred.

"oh yes of course! We're her with Lilyheart, Lilyheart what's your name?" Sandstorm asked.

"uhm lilyheart."

"Oh I see, so what are you?"

" a medicine cat."

"do you write?"

"Yes I started my own Fanfic it is Random Warriors! You should read it sometime. Tsa bit short though."

"Well I'd be please to!"

"Great. So what do you do?"

"nice of you to ask. I am sandstorm and I work with cat news."

"wonderful."

"yes it is isn't it? So I should go now thank you and good bye"

"bye-bye"

Commercials.

Alalalal

Lalala

Lallal

OOOOOHH cat news!

"So yaw we're back" Firestar purred.

"HEY! Who said I'd murder anyone!" Tigerstar hissed trying to get out of his cage.

"that's what the boxers said." Firestar hissed.

"YES! They did! And they got stolen by the underpants gnomes!"

"WELL BECAUSE UNDERPANTS CAN TAKE OVER THE WORLD!" Firestar hissed.

Everyone was quiet.

"lets conclude?" sandstorm asked.

"YES!" cloudtail hissed while crying- it was weird.

Don't fuss over spelling and grammar I'm lazy and frustrated. Have fun reading AND REVIEWING? You all rock!

Love killerprinceesssssssss


	36. bramby and cloudtails conspiricies?

Hello everyone! this Chapter is dedicated to this person in my class- I remembered A speech he made about the bird conspiricy! i remembered how funny it was and decided to put a bit of it on cat news! Please enjoy this lovely chapter! No flames no annoying my for grammar or spelling either i kind of wrote this in 5 minutes lawl.

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm purred slowly combing Firestars hair, with the most crazy expression on her face. She had tied up Firestar about 30 minutes ago.

"yes welcome" Firestar squeaked, and with a short quiet whisper he whimpered "help?"

"don't worry it will be all over soon" sandstorm purred- looking even more crazy combing Firestars hair even harder while firestar started crying in fear.

"Uhm anyhow- we're here with cloudtail who has some news." Graystripe purred putting on his serious face for the first time.

"Alright so I have a very important story this good afternoon" Cloudtail said slowly wandering around the room. "YOU!" cloudtail said lifting up sandstorms chin. "I find your craziness very attractice young lady. But that's not our news" Cloudtail meowed walking back to his seat, while sandstorm blushed going back to combing firestar hair. "firestar was caught this morning, Eating breakfast innocently in spottedleafs house."

Sandstorm hissed "Darn right he did!" She hissed combing Firestars hair even harder than before making his fur poof out 10x its original length.

"Sandstorm of course quickly tied firestar up- as you see now- amd is now punishing him after she dragged him here am I right?" Cloudtail asked while everyone nodded quietly. "Now here's what happened I walked in and asked Spottedleaf, why was firestar here?"

Everyone leaned forward in anticipation.

"She said, Firestar needed a quick meal- he ran out of his house in a rush, I asked him why, and he said softly Tigerstar- I need Tigerstar. She stopped for a moment, and said- Someything very odd is happening. I have a prophecy but bluestar that bchti told be I have to tell you all in 3 and a half weeks so yah. Total BS" Cloudtail said, very seriously. "So I came to this conclusion- Tigerstar is wearing boxers now, He's not shoving cheese down his pants and his attitude is comepletely different- WHICH BRINGS US ALL TO THIS! Tigerstar is going to attack- again and I think its Windclan." Cloudtail hissed.

"Firestar! HOW COULD YOU commit to this conspiracy!?" sandstorm hissed smacking firestar making his hair un-poof itself.

"OUCH! Hey! I wanted to ask him where he kept his thongs after he got rid of them- Leafpaw and Squirrelflight wanted them!!" Firestar hissed, sandstorm started to put scrunchies and hair clips all in his fur.

"It's like the bird conspiracy" Brambleclaw hissed in the Darkness.

"What?" all the cats meowed in anticipation.

"The biiirds! I said the birds! Don't you notice them?" Brambleclaw hissed popping out of the shadows- he appeared before everyone, much furrier than before, he needed a fur-cut. He's eyes were full of fear and he was randomly wearing a wizard hat, and held a staff for some odd reason.

"What about them?" Graystripe asked shivering.

"Don't you notice? Whenever you walk up to them they fly away- WHAT ARE THEY RUNNING AWAY FROM?? What are they keeping from us??" Brambleclaw hissed with rage, everyone looked around at each other in fear.

"And then- There is pet birds! They are spies! Watching what we do- trying to learn our weakness' and then! They say if a bird poops on you its good luck- well WHAT IF IT'S A TRACKING SYSTEM??" Brambleclaw gasped while he ran back into the shadows, everyone looked around for birds.

"remember- you didn't hear it form me, or else they'll look for me and I'll e dead within the hour" Brambleclaw whispered and disappeared.

Everyone sat back at their desks and whispered "commercials…"

COMMERCIALS!!

Lalala

Lalala

Lalala

Lalala

Ooh cat news!

"Anyhow! Since your all scared I'll just do the stupid weather- look out your window OKAY? YOU GOT THAT? YOUR WINDOW!" silverstream meowed

"but the birds are out the window!" Graystripe cried.

"Oh you're all acting like frightened KITS! Its cloudy" Silverstream hissed.

"Well we should conclude this episode- We're too frightened to say anything- or the birds or even tigerstar might kill us all! Byebye!" Graystripe trembled.

* * *

Read and review please- no flamerzzzzzzz


	37. sumtin weirds happening

CAT NEWS:

This chapter is dedicated to my friend Kat, Oddsponge13, She introduced me to Fanfic, and helped me with my first fanfic Warriors reeetarded and weird series, and inspired me with one of her fanfics-the BEST fanfic ever created -in my opinion-

Now here's a chapter I wrote based on one of her Ideas.

* * *

It was a normal, sunny day at cat news, Tigerstar was prepping up for his date he had for this afternoon, he looked around in his closet, searching for a pair of boxers pants and a top. Tigerstar gasped- he wanted something That told the world "I'm Bi and im proud" Tigerstar gasped as he grabbed a pink and black polka-dotted Metallic Bra, and a simple pair of white boxers he hated, but he thought it was simple enough.

Sandstorm walked into the room putting In her earrings for today's Episode of cat news and she closed her eyes tightly "Oh I'm sorry!" She shrieked, embarrassed for walking in on Tigerstar in just boxers and a stuffed metallic bra.

"I need help" Tigerstar gasped ashamed on what he just said, normally he just grabs a trashy Britney spears outfit with fish net tights and goes out in front of a camera live and reports a story- but he was getting serious now, he wanted to seem serious with his relationship, after if it worked out for him, he would be happy. And be whoever he wanted to be.

"Oh well this skirt is your style…" Sandstorm said bringing out a skirt, which looked more like a belt, but was a skirt. Tigerstar gasped, sandstorm stood up alarmed and asked quietly "what are you looking for?"

"well" Tigerstar paused for a moment. "I need something that says I still have my 'sexy personalitay' But also says I'm not a gender confused freak, and also says I'm bi and proud. You know?" Tigerstar asked shyly.

Sandstorm looked at tigerstar in shock. And looked around in his closet "this is all girls stuff Tigerstar! Don't you have anything else?" Sandstorm asked.

Tigerstar sighed his arms crossed, still crossed he pointed to a small box in the corner of his tiny studio. "I think theres stuff in there that I used to wear in high school…" Tigerstar meowed with a hint of excitement in his voice- Could he really get the look he wanted?

"Well, heres a nice pair of pants for you…" Sandstorm said pulling out a pair of black business-y pants with white strips on them.

"but that looks to serious!" Tigerstar cried.

"don't worry! We can work with it TRUST me" Sandstorm purred.

"All right… I trust you!" Tigerstar gasped.

Sandstorm looked even harder, looking for a black shirt, with some sort of logo or picture on it, in gray. "is this okay?" Sandstorm gasped, settling with a black long sleeve shirt, with a tank top that was a black with a hint of gray colour, with Tigey Written in it in perfect handwriting in white.

"Perfect!" Tigerstar purred quickly putting on his new outfit. "wait, it's missing something" Tigerstar sighed.

Sandstorm paused "be right back! Wait right here."

Tigerstar waited, walking around the room nervously, Cat news was going to be on air in 30 minutes and his date was in 2 hours.

"back!" Sandstorm purred putting her favourite white sweater on tigerstar, and a black and white stripped scarf.

"Are you sure? This is your favourite sweater!" Tigerstar asked.

"You deserve it, you may be evil at the moment, but you were there for me when firestar- well you know…and when Squirrelflight needed you, you helped her and were like her best friend and more! Now get a pair of sunglasses or something, and don't ruin yourself before your date! Have fun!" Sandstorm purred walking away.

Tigerstar purred to himself and lay on his bed, and quickly grabbed a small black box from under his pillow, he opened the case and saw a diamond engagement ring. "I hope you say yes…." Tigerstar muttered to himself, putting his ring into his pocket.

15 minutes to cat news.

Graystripe walked passed cloudtails room, and heard small whispers…

_But Cloudtail! I'm married!_

_I know I know! But, your so…_

_Nice? Because I'm not nice!_

_I meant crazy, I love crazy, crazy is hot. Please say you love me too?_

_Well I do love your outfits…_

_Uh huh…_

_Oh cloudtail No! I'm not going to say it! I refuse its wrong!_

Sandstorm bursted out of Cloudtails room, graystipre looked at her oddly.

"What are you looking at? I did nothng wrong!" Sandstorm hissed

"of course…" Graystripe gasped "have you seen my gameboy?"

"yes its in your hand." Sandstorm meowed more relaxed.

"OHH! I didn't notice it, Okay great." Graystripe purred.

"5 minutes to cat news! EVERYONE TAKE THEIR PLACES!!" Shadowheart meowed loudly, soon everyone sat in their seats and made sure they looked okay, not lip stick on the tom cats, no messy hair on the girls, and DEFINATLY had to make sure the girls didn't walk out without their tops fully buttoned, It happened once with sandstorm screaming "IM READY IM READY!" from her room because she was late that day, it was very awkward.

"Hello and welcome to cat news!" Sandstorm meowed.

"yes welcome" Cloudtail purred leaning closer to sandstorm.

"we're all back over our fears of birds, now Tigerstar you have some news?" Firestar meowed calmly.

"yes! Well, first of all do you all love my outfit?" Tigerstar asked, everyone nodded. "GREAT! Sandstorm picked it out" Tigerstar smiled, then paused for a moment, he could have just got sandstorm into more trouble than she already was, they were both keeping big secrets. "she picked it out because if she didn't I would have smudged her eye liner!" Tigerstar said quickly.

"yah Tigerstars a bchti" Sandstorm.

Graystripe sighed for a moment. "Why does everyone keep saying bchti?? Isn't it bit…" Graystripe got cut off by silverstream.

"I don't want my baby to be swearing!" Silverstream hissed "oh yah and its sunny looked out your windows bchti's!"

"I'm not a baby anymore! Infact I never even knew you when I was a baby!" Graystripe hissed and started texting millie. "Hey have you guys seen my jetpack?" graystipre asked softly.

"yes its under your bed and I have news? LIKE OMG!?" Tigerstar hissed "And sandstorm, this sweater seems a little snug…" Tigerstar gasped.

"well yah its supposed to." Sandstorm gasped

"alright…Well, anyways, Tallstar is all frightened because I hear there's going to be an attack today! Oh no!" Tigerstar said trying to hide his smile.

"oh dear I wonder who's going to attack!" Bluestar hissed in Starclan "THAT BCHTI! He fudging dumping me that bass hole!" Bluestar started crying while hugging Darkstripe.

"well we don't have much more news today" cloudtail gasped.

Brambleclaw walked out of his dark corner, his beard was dragging across the floor and had the most crazy paranoid expression on his face. "I see dead birds" Brambleclaw hissed "THEIR GIVING ME A PROPHECY!"

"I thought you hated birds?" Firestar hissed.

"well I do but these toucans, toucans are cool. Anyhow something bad is going to happen on Friday the 13ths, which is randomly tomorrow, but it gets worse on Saturday the 14th!" Brambleclaw hissed running back into his dark corner.

Everyone mumbled to each other "should we believe him?"

"Well this concludes this episode of cat news!" Graystripe purred.

"AANNDD!! Cut!" Shadowheart meowed. "excellent show today guys!"

"I think I should leave early" Tigerstar coughed

"yah me too!" Cloudtail sandstorm Firestar and Silverstream said all together, running out the front door.

In a fancy restaurant in the middle of a two leg city.

Tigerstar sat down, his date hadn't arrived yet. He fiddled around with his napkin until a waiter came. "excuse me sir! Can you help me?"

"of course what do you need?" The waiter asked.

"I have a lovely date coming and I wish to propose can you maybe bring a pretty candle here?" Tigerstar asked calmly.

"Of course sir!" the waiter said and went to grab a candle and set it on tigerstars table.

"Sorry I'm late!"

"it's okay hun" Tigerstar said looking into his lovers gorgeous eyes.

"Hello what can I get you two?" The waiter said with a smile.

"I'll get your salad, with chicken please" Tigerstar purred and handed the waiter his menu.

"Can I get the salmon please?"

"of course! I'll be right back you two" The waiter said walking away.

"Theres something I wanted to ask you…" Tigerstar meowed, looking at his lovers eyes.

"What is it?"

"I know, I know this is awkward for you, and maybe a bit too soon,but I love you and you know you love me too! So I ask you…" Tigerstar said holding onto his lovers hands.

"what is it?"

"Firestar, will you marry me?" Tigerstar asked.

Firestar looked at tigerstar, their food just arrived, and so did their bill for some odd reason, firestar started eating, ignoring tigerstar.

fireestar quickly took a drink of his water, with his ring in it, and started choking on it.

"OMG FIRESTAR!" Tigerstar gasped, soon firestar spat it out, tigerstar sighed in releif.

Tigerstar quickly ate his salad in about 2.35 secounds, and looked up at firestar who was looking at his food eating slowly. "Well?"

"I don't know tigerstar…" Firestar gasped.

"Listen I know you need to think, it's okay, just tell me when you decide alright?" Tigerstar said and he winked slyly, paid the bill and left.

"Oh what am I going to do?" Firestar gasped.

Meanwhile at cloudtails house.

"So have you decided?" Cloudtail asked sandstorm.

"well! I don't know- I'll have to ask my t- err best friend for hi- err her advice. I'll see you tomorrow." Sandstorm gasped running off.

To be continued.

* * *

YES! Tigerstar loves firestar! Yes firestar loves him too!! I KNOW its so weird, but come on tigerstar SO always had a crush on Firestar, because we all know how powerful tigerstar was, he could have killed Firestar all along, He could have been dead, but no, he didn't kill firestar, he even could have killed him while he was asleep, so think about it, tigerstar so loves firestar! I mean they seem so perfect (atleast on cat news) I know it's a shocker, it's the point, and idk if it worked but I tried to make it suspenseful of who tigerstar was going out with but I did give hints in other chapters, because tigey always flirted with firestar, and last chapter what did you think firestar was doing at tigerstars house? Certainly not getting thongs! It was a movie night! And now I leave one more suspenseful thing for you all, what did cloudtail ask sandstorm? If you find out you get a cookie!

Hope you liked sorry if its too long!

DON'T get mad at me for spelling or grammar, NO flames either, Thanks!


	38. Bye everyone

Cat news NEWS REPORT THINGY please read.

OKay so you guys i'm discontinueing cat news.

I know i know this may upset some people

But i might start it up again...who knows? the thing is i haven't had time to submit any cat news chapters...

Plus i've started to write my own book 3 and its not like "ZAWMAWGAWD OKEY LYK I WENT TO THE MALLLLL AND I GOT SHOOOESS..." Its like a normal book so im happeh...anyways I give permission to anyone on fanfiction to continue on the cat newsnessossity, as long as you gigve some reference...it can be small big retarded idc )

YOu guys are great, excet for you flamers. Im sorry if you ever flamed my work, I can't call yo great because ur just and awful person whos like "nyyarr grammer...spelling...tigerstar isn't ghey wth.." Yeah that doesn;'t make too much sense but whatever.

Ilove you all (cept for flamers) You all have been wonderful (except flamers...) have a wonderful year...day..week..life..death...summer vacation..school year...job..whatever...

-Princess 3


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